Quote:
Originally posted by jwright25
I have a question for those who believe all legacies should be offered a bid regardless of what the chapter thinks. And I do not mean this question disrespectfully, but rather in asking advice for how to handle this situation should it arise in the future. If your daughter or sister is released by her legacy chapter for standards reasons - i.e., she has been seen drinking heavily, using illegal drugs, acting promiscuously - what should I tell you as the advisor who calls to inform you of the release? And what should I tell you if she was released because she was acting snobby and telling everyone in the chapter - as well as other chapters and PNMs that she is "definitely going ADPi" cause she's a legacy and legacies are automatic bids? These are situations that I have encountered. In both of these cases, the family member has complained, threatened to cut ties, and wondered loudly (and rudely) where all the respect has gone. One alumna insisted that her sister was just the most fabulous thing going - an opinion that was not shared by one single active collegian. Sometimes love is (and should be) blind. Peers witness things that others don't.
|
I am not sure what our adviser said when/if she made those calls, but I was under the impression that membership selection is totally confidential, and that includes alumnae. I would envision a polite conversation of, "Unfortunately I am calling as a courtesy to you to inform you that AB Chapter has released your daughter. I am sure you understand that MS cannot be discussed, and we wish your daughter well." I don't see what else could be said without violating the secrecy of MS. I can certainly imagine LOTS of other things being said on the other end of the line, but not from the chapter.