Part of me wants to start up a phony MySpace account and message all his bleached blonde Friends on his page to let them know about his weenus.

ETA: He still has a picture of his stump uploaded online. Oh, what a great memory I have. I should send it to them too.

He may have made me feel like shit for one night, but he has to live a lifetime with that AAA battery and Imma make sure he don't forget that.