Quote:
Originally posted by valkyrie
HAHAHAHawkeyes!!! LOLZ.
I've never understood the idea that many people seem to have that you have to be single to learn/grow/mature/whatever. To me, that's like saying you can't walk and chew gum at the same time.
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There are people who define their self worth based on their significant others and therefore, cannot fathom the idea of NOT having a boyfriend/girlfriend. They tend to stay with a bad bf/gf just to have someone and they aren't ever the ones to break up unless they have someone else waiting in the wings. They end up being needy, clingy and dependent, and those are the ones who need to spend some time alone, to find out who they are on their own, and learn to define their self worth in other ways. It doesn't apply to everybody, in my eyes, just to those who think they are nothing without a SO. Also, the type that I described above tend to morph into what they think the person they like wants them to be instead of being themselves and ending up with someone compatible. It's more important to be with SOMEBODY without real regard for whether that person is healthy for them or compatible with them. Women tend to do this more than men, but I've definitely dated some men who were terrified of being alone too and were just too clingy and dependent.
ETA: As to the original question, I would want to know why the person was still dating someone if they weren't happy in the relationship. If you aren't happy, leave it and then pursue someone else. I would remain in the friend category with the person and when/if they break up with this other person, then seek a new opportunity with them.
Dee