Quote:
Originally posted by crunchies
Um. Why so much hostility?
I din't spend last year figuring out sororities' reputations beucase I had better things to do with my time than ask around about stereotypes amongst the Greek population, which still remains a small percentage of people on campus. I had no intention of rushing at all until late this summer, and even then I wasn't interested in reputations as much as personality of the girls involved.
You're missing my point about reputations around campus, too. The non-Greek students CAN'T tell one sorority from another, you're right, but because you belong to an organization at all a lot of them make snap judgements about you the other way- that you are snobby, rich, coked-up, have an eating disorder, etc- not necessarily stereotypes I agree with, but not ones I'd like to inflict upon myself, either. The Greeks, who CAN tell, though, think you're a loser.
Incidentally, I don't care about the frats one way or the other. I was just making a point about reputation and the limited social aspect.
And don't pretend that I'm the only person in the world awful and shallow enough to wonder if belonging to an social organization w/ a bad name and mediocre social opportunities is worth my time, effort, and money. Friendship is great and all, but as someone else pointed out, I could make friends on my own that I woudln't have to dish out a couple thousand dollars a year for.
Oh, and I'm not quite sure you totally *got* the gist of James' post.
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Why so much hostility? Because a lot of people on here are members or alums of struggling chapters and have had to put up with people like you dragging the whole chapter down. It's hard enough to keep up morale without having to feel like all of pledgeship is one big long rush party trying to beg girls to stay interested and happy they are there.
I didn't say you should ask around - I think you should be smart enough to figure things out for yourself. You had a year to get to know sorority members on your own - they don't live in biospheres, do they? I find it hard to believe that until rush, you never spoke to sorority members, had classes with them, or went to any social events where they might have been. At the schools that have deferred rush that's the whole point (or should be). You get to know people through regular social channels instead of the (necessary) fakiness of formal rush. That way you can at least form an opinion about some of the members of the groups.
I'm not pretending you're the only person who has gone through this or was upset by the lack of social opportunities presented to them, but you asked for advice, and here it is. You're not happy where you are, and unless you want to fake it for the next three years, you will make those around you in the sorority unhappy as well. So unless you're really going to make a conscious effort to get to know the older members of your chapter and your pledge sisters who DO want to be there, I would say pack it in now, before you're initiated. Have a little respect for others.
And honey - I have known James for a LONG time, and believe me, I understand what he's trying to tell you.