[BlueReign]

I understand where you're coming from BUT, be careful how you present yourself. I am hoping that you don't go around talking like this. I come from a similar background but I didn't let that stop me from talking to and making friends with everybody when I was in college and even up to the present. Be your proud self and people will always respect you.

Originally posted by Amaterasu
I'm non-Greek...I guess I'll share...

I suppose my biggest apprehension is sort of being unknowing. I mean, I guess I feel like BGLOs (or elite black groups in general) aren't very...welcoming to students who don't have legacy or family history. It's like not only does it matter who you are, but also who your parents and your parents' parents are. For someone like me -- I'm definitely working-class; I am THE FIRST person in my family to attend college traditionally (mother received her nursing certificate from a tech school before I entered; after I went in, she started pursuing her bachelor's); my family hasn't done anything particularly significant in the community, nor do they have a lot of money. Most of their associates also aren't graduates of college, much less sorority/fraternity members. So I never had the privilege of doing Jack & Jill, debutante cotillions, or societies like those in school.

Now I am at an HBCU where it seems most of the students are upper-middleclass (as the school is notorious for skimpy financial aid). Most of my friends are "legacies" of my school, have mothers and fathers who are members of sororities/fraternities, were in Jack & Jill, their parents are Links or Boules, and they have the money...I had never even HEARD of Jack & Jill before I came to this college. And I had heard of sororities/fraternities but really didn't know what they are.

And now I am just more confused. I have done my research, and decided I click, but I feel like I just don't have the same opportunities as these women who come from long lines of ABC or XYZ org and whose mothers have sorority sisters to write them recommendations and the like. I know ONE graduate member of the organization that I am interested in and have no idea if she is financial, and it's not because I lack community service or anything like that -- I have just only happened to have come across one, and I developed a relationship with her as a mentor and counselor. At the time her Greek affiliation didn't really strike me as anything because I barely knew what a Greek was.

And I know (now anyway) that these groups require a recommendation from an active, financial soror. I mean, how are you supposed to meet these members if you grew up in an environment such as I did? I know next to nothing about the actual intake process -- I didn't know about the not wearing of the colors thing or the "go to all of their events!" thing. I mean, some of it seemed common sense, and I participated in things because I WANTED to and not just because I wanted to join XYZ, but...

So I guess I what I want to say is...too often the assumption is that students know the correct protocol to follow for applying to and getting accepted to the org of choice. They think you know stuff. But even the very basic things, like not wearing the colors to RUSH or not saying "I've wanted to be an XYZ since high school" may seem to be common sense, but may not be so common to those who haven't been exposed. I know that the secrecy of the org is part of what makes it so special, but I wish there were more information disseminated about what it takes to become an XYZ, and what they actually do for the community.

And the graduate chapters in my area don't seem to be very involved with the undergraduates, which I would like to see. It seems like there's a huge gap between grad chapters and undergrad chapters -- their missions, their philosophies, their ideas. Everyone tells me, "You should ask your questions to grads because they will be nicer." Well, why is that?