lilith - first congrats on the bid!! I'm going to jump into the fray and say go for it with DZ for a couple reasons...
-Being a chapter founder is exciting and history making but also MUCH more time consuming than pledging an established group. The national gives you a lot of help, but there is a lot on your shoulders that wouldn't be if you join something already there.
-Part 2 on the time factor - if you are an athlete it takes up a lot of your time, and the colonizing might simply take more than you can give.
-You have a bid in your hand from DZ right now. The groups that come in may not offer you a bid.
-It sounds like you really do like DZ and one of the few things that's holding you back is this one girl. Believe me every sister is not going to be your bestest friend - once you get over 10 girls together that's pretty much impossible. When the sorority voted to give you a bid, she had the chance to put her 2 cents in, and one of 2 things happened: a) she said nothing, and b) she said something and no one else cared. I think she is probably trying to move on with her life too and isn't blaming you for whatever happened between her and your sweetie.
Those are just my opinions...you have to listen to your heart first and foremost. Good luck!
