[DeltAlum]

Originally posted by hoosier
From recent issues:

FACT: During a study on the competency of teachers, half the teachers failed a qualifying verbal and math test

RESPONSE: Probably because they had to memorize answers for standardized tests.

FACT: The recently approved Highway Bill includes $255 million for bike paths

RESPONSE: Which should fit in well with the President's request that we limit our driving.

FACT: The top 50% of income earners pay 96.5% of the federal income taxes, while the lowest 44% pay no federal income taxes.

RESPONSE: No wonder the country is borrowing so much -- the President keeps giving the top income people tax cuts.

FACT: The federal government -- with your tax dollars -- subsidizes programs for kids to play golf at posh resorts

RESPONSE: Don't look at me. I live in a golf course community, but none of our family has ever played a round.

FACT: Federal employees spent $16.4 billion in 2003 on government charge cards. Some of those charges included: country club fees, personal clothing, movie gift certificates and beer

RESPONSE: Yeah, those Bush boys really know how to dress and drink.

FACT: A recent national survey found that Democratic professors outnumber Republican professors 3 to 1 in economics, 28 to 1 in sociology, and 30 to 1 in anthropology

RESPONSE: That's why I majored in broadcasting where they had to teach "the Fairness Doctrine" and equal opportunity. Of course those were dropped under the Powell regime at the FCC.

FACT: At least 1,074,000 illegal aliens were arrested along the Mexican border in 2004, more than in 2003 or 2002

RESPONSE: And California still can't find enough farm workers, so Congress wants to make it legal for them to work here.

FACT: The federal government is subsidizing yoga research

RESPONSE: That's a stretch. (get it?)