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I agree - go to the DZ event and then see. Keep in mind they may not offer you a bid (I hate to sound so negative, but it's a possibility). If they do, and you feel comfortable, go with it; if not, don't, and wait for the colonization.
One woman does not a sorority make. If your fiance's ex is just one of 50 or 60 sisters, don't worry about her, just make friends with your other sisters.
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