[BBelleADPi]

You say you respect the mother, but are you the closest of friends? When the weekend is over, and you have fulfilled a duty to the friend, will you kick yourself because you didn't fulfill what you needed to do for yourself? To me, no contest, the conference, especially if the woman is a friend who is close enough to understand.

Actually, I could possibly be in a similar situation: one of my very closest friend's daughter is getting married in either November or December, but has not yet set a wedding date because of other factors they are waiting to find out about. (It will be a small, but intimate, wedding). As much as I want to be there both for my friend and for the little girl I have watched grow up, my two older sisters (real life) and I are planning to take our daughters to see the Radio City Music Hall Christmas Show on a set weekend in December, and I must buy the tickets within the next week. I am so very afraid the wedding will end up being the same date, but I have to go with what is best for me. My sisters and I get together ONCE a year at Christmas for sure, and about every four years in June for vacation, so this is an extremely rare outing for all of us, as well as our daughters. I simply can't miss this time to make memories, and I know that my friend TRULY will not only understand, but would kick me if I didn't make the family choice.
More importantly, I know that I would kick myself after the weekend was over if I attended the wedding, and not made memories with MY family. I think yours is a similar situation-you'd like to do what is RIGHT (support your friend), and you'd also truly LIKE to be there (it's not like you're trying to get out of it), but the reality of making a living is the wiser, and longer-lasting choice. Don't ya just hate it when things turn out like that? It's not like it's earth-shattering or anything, but it gets under your skin!