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This is a very sticky situation.
I can give two pieces of advice for your lil sis.
1) She should talk to her friend all about greek life, about the many wonderful sororities you have on your campus. Make sure she emphasizes the friends she has in each of the chapters - how you can still be great friends even if you aren't sisters - how some people, while they may be awesome friends, just fit better in different houses. If your lil sis's friend realizes that she can still maintain her friendship with your lil after joining a different organization, it might help.
2) If after this advice, her friend doesn't seem to get it, and appears to be rushing for the wrong reasons (only for admiration of your lil sis, etc.), I would strongly encourage your lil (you could even go with her) to speak with your rush chair about the situation. That way your lil sis not "bad mouthing" her friend to her sisters in the slightest; on the contrary, she is looking out for the interests of both your house and her friend.
Finally though, what are the reasons that you believe your lil doesn't want her friend to join? Is it merely a matter of she doesn't want her friend to follow her into her sorority? Or is it more extreme, that her friend appears to not be able to make decisions on her own and follows your lil's course of action in every situation?
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