JAM, I've read some very good advice on aol.com about what to do if your child is extremely scared. Some of the best experts have written lately. I'm going to check but I'll bet that John Rosemond has something good on his website,
www.johnrosemond.com and it seems like Time had something too.
That kind of accidental death does something to you...my uncle was killed as a child when he and his friend were cleaning a rifle and my mother, his closest sibling in age, really never got over it.