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Around here the general rule seems to be gifts for engagement parties and showers but cash is the norm for the actual wedding.
As for chipping in toward the gift unless you were invited because you are also friends with the couple getting married its not your responsibity. He should give more cash or a nicer gift though because he is bringing a guest. It costs more money for the couple to have more people there and if you're not particularly close friends with then you're going more for him then for them.
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