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Okay, I'm thinking. What a terrible situation!
The guy is an ass. You said that you have house rules -- well, your roommate is basically violating the rules by inviting this slob over all the time. I mean, who poops and doesn't flush?? The behavior you described is outrageous. The problem is that there seems to be no consequence to violating the rules -- okay, he makes a mess, doesn't give a damn about anyone else and takes advantage of you all and nothing happens, except you getting upset (which doesn't matter to him).
It sounds like you have tried to talk to your roommate and she just gets defensive and angry. I don't really know what to suggest next. You really shouldn't have to (because your roommate should) but you could try talking to the guy, right, or both of them?
Why can't you and the third roommate (who should support you whether she's around or not) tell her that he's not welcome any more? She pays 1/3 of the rent, but not enough to make up for his lame ass disrespectful actions and all the stuff he eats/breaks/poops. Why doesn't she go visit him sometimes? Why does he need to come over every week? What on earth does your roommate see in a guy who is such an ass and has no respect for her and her friends and who expects her to clean up after him?
If it looks like moving out is your only option, try to find someone else to take your place and pay your share of the rent.
Or, if you talk to them and nothing gets resolved and you really don't want to move, just be even more obnoxious than he is. Ha ha. You could keep track of everything he eats and breaks, and send him a bill at the end of the month.
You know, I just thought of this -- does your school have anything like student mediation? I'm wondering if there's someplace on campus where you guys can go and discuss this, and get input and suggestions from a neutral third party. That might work.
Eeek. Good luck!
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