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OK. I've seen this before and I'll tell you how to solve your problem and have fun with it too.
But first, let me offer you some advice that will help you in real life (undergraduate fraternity-sorority is not real life). 1) Listen to women like 33girl and gpb1874 who counsel cooperation and diplomacy; that approach will be valuable to you when you deal with adults. And, 2) make a point of expressing your strong feelings without the coarse language. In the real world, when you use the language you've been using here, no one above the age of 19 will take seriously anything you have to say. You have passion and I admire that. Hang onto that, always.
Now, here's how to have fun with this. Sororities and fraternities are very different. Undergraduate men typically don't have the patience or interest to pour over volumes of by-laws and long email essays. Men like a minimum of rules. That's how weasels control your IFC. They befuddle everyone else with "process" and mountains of rules and paperwork. My guess is that your Greek Advisor has discovered an easy path for him: he can control the system by placing his own weasley, hand-picked "home room monitors" in charge and then let them enforce his will using the indecipherable maze of regulations and rules of order you describe.
Realistically, no one on your side is going to plow through all that stuff. You don't have to! Remember: never play by the other guy's rules. The weasels love "the process" and the paperwork and the rules, and they want you to fight them on a field of their own choosing.
Refuse to do it.
If you want to have fun, and see some scrambling and screaming by the other side, then do this:
1. Have a meeting of just the Big Eight (as you describe them) chapters and organize them around the issue of small chapter weasels controling the IFC.
2. Elect officers, and very important: choose an articulate, respected spokesman to state your case to the administration and anyone else who inquires.
3. Announce that the Big Eight is leaving IFC and has formed a new trade association/representative body. This new organization will represent these fraternities to the Administration (you might include wording here praising the university for their openness in recognizing diverse interests - i.e. black fraternities and sororities in one council, multi-culturals in another, PanHellenic in a third and so on.) What you're doing, you say, is simply following that model. Since the IFC no longer represents your interests, you have formed an organization that does represetn your large fraternity culture. And, one of the signal features of your new organization is "One Man, One Vote". If Alpha Beta fraternity has 75 members, then their representative has 75 votes on any issue.
4. Never, under any circumstances, make any reference to the wet-dry issue, because this is what your opponents will use to discredit you. Just say, "We want to obey all the relevant laws and university rules on any alcohol-related issue...however, OUR issue is that the IFC does not represent our interests, it cannot be reformed to represetn us and we will no longer participate."
5. Focus you objection on the dictatorial atmosphere of the IFC, and on the fact that the small houses have seized control, "apparently under the banner of the Greek Advisor".
6. Formally ask the university to assist with the separation process by providing a neutral advisor for all parties, like a vice president.
7. The new organization speaks only through their officers. The FIRST THING our opponents will try to do is peel off the members of your group: divide and conquer. Speak through one voice.
What you will do effectively is to take control of the game and play it on your own terms. Trust me, if this IFC Advisor is the type I think he is, the university is completely unaware of any of the issues or of any of your complaints. If there's anything administrations hate worse than public trouble, it's surprises. This will hit like a shock wave, and all the eyes will turn to the IFC Advisor who will be treated as someone who "has let matters get out of hand." He will immediately be on the defensive.
When they come to you and ask why didn't you voice these concerns earlier, your man says, "We did, and no one listened."
When they ask you why you don't stay in IFC and "work to reform the system from within." you say, "The system is unfair, and reform will take longer than we have to spend - we're only here a few years - so we've created an organization that is fair and represents our interests."
I saw something like this happen at the University of Georgia a long time ago. Small house weasels got control of the IFC and changed the rush rules to the disadvantage of the major fraternities. Remember: don't let the other guy set the rules. The major fraternities simply got together and announced that there would be two rushes that fall at Georgia, the IFC Rush for anyone who desired to join one of those fraternities, and the "President's Preferred Rush" for anyone who wanted to join one of the big dogs. I think the administration got involved and order was restored back to Nature.
Have fun.
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