[soft&beautiful]

You know a lot of my single friends ask me, just how do you do it?
What is your secret for making it work? I tell them this, you see most people search for what they want and not for what they need. Ask yourself what do I really need? Another thing, stop searching for a man!
We, as women sometimes, never ask ourselves what does God expect of me and what do I expect from myself? Am I commited to this expectation? What will truly complete me? What things are absolutely necessary for me to have completeness?

Alot of women have unrealistic expectations from their mate and themselves;so once the "honeymoon" phase is over we begin to become either unhappy or begin to settle. We don't take into consideration what makes a healthy relationship:

Treating each other with respect
Feeling secure and comfortable
Are not violent with each other
Try to resolve conflicts satisfactorily:agreeing to disagree
Enjoying the time you spend together
Supporting one another
Taking interest in one another's lives: health, family, work, etc.
Having privacy in the relationship:keep friends, family, etc. out
Trusting each other
Are each sexual by choice
Communicating clearly and openly
Making healthy decisions about alcohol or other drugs
Encouraging other friendships
Honest about your past and present sexual activity if the relationship is intimate


God will always present someone to you in your life that you really need and who really needs you. We have been designed that way: to need each other. But as we normally do, we turn what God gives us away. Then you may ask yourself how do I know if this is it? The answer is simple: over time. There is no deadline on love or happiness. Stop setting the bar so high that it could become truly unobtainable i.e. married by 23, kids by 25. Life and love knows no course without divine instruction.

Good luck to all,
BTW, btb and 9dstpm, I am going to pray for you...God truly has a plan for your life.