Professor, you wrote:
"While my brother has several kids, he supports them, spends time with them and is actually a caring parent. He lacks in the area of providing example by education and culture. I don't have time to think of the best way of describing things better but I want the girls to be in the clubs like jack and jill, the deb balls, top ladies and take dance and so forth. He does not understand the importance of shaping a child and presenting positive relations to children. He hated this type of thing which he calls middle class supreamacy while I am very supportive. Anyway, I give the girls culture and exposure to things that I value."
I applaud you for your efforts! However, it seems that you and your brother have a difference of opinion as to what children need growing up. You indicated that he supports them and spends time with them. I think that that's pretty much all kinds really need at base so I guess that I would not worry so much if they are not in Jack and Jill and Deb balls b/c truly, only about 5% of the AA population has even heard of such... and many of us come from middle class environments. I do understand why he may think that it is middle class supremacy and can't say that I disagree so much. For instance, do you know that his kids *probably* could not be in Jack and Jill, even if he agreed? They don't generally take kids whose fathers have children all over town. To me, that *is* middle class supremacy. My friend was in Jack and Jill and, it may be different in his town, but with their chapter, both parents had to have college degrees and be professionals in the community. You couldn't just come from a good working class family...that was not good enough. Therefore, there may some merit to his feeling that organizations such as those are just middle class supremacy. The same with being a deb. I understand your concern but I just don't think that having them rub shoulders with the upper crust is what is optimal for them. Your brother may be concerned that his girls would not fit in well in the hooty tooty society events and may even be mocked by the other children. How about good old community programs? Do you think that he would be more amenable to programs/orgs that everyone (regardless of financial stature) may participate in like the girl scouts? How about encouraging them to learn to play a musical instrument in school? Or a good program at the Y or the community center? You mentioned him turning down dance classes. Do you think that he would be more amenable to something on the cultural side like African dance classes? I can't think of many other things but girl scouts, learning to play an instrument and African dance classes are all things that can help the girls develop education and culture outside of their "backyards" but may not be perceived as middle class supremacy by your brother.
Hang in there! The girls will remember and are being greatly shaped by your efforts!
Quote:
Originally posted by Professor
My Brother is a bad seed but I love him. He did not take advantage of opportunities provided by my parents. My family is very middle class and the seed had the clothes, associations, love and supports just like other middle class families. He just took a wrong and different path. He is a member of the rap generation and I really attribute many of his behaviors with that thug culture.
While my brother has several kids, he supports them, spends time with them and is actually a caring parent. He lacks in the area of providing example by education and culture. I don't have time to think of the best way of describing things better but I want the girls to be in the clubs like jack and jill, the deb balls, top ladies and take dance and so forth. He does not understand the importance of shaping a child and presenting positive relations to children. He hated this type of thing which he calls middle class supreamacy while I am very supportive. Anyway, I give the girls culture and exposure to things that I value. I don't have kids and so my brother's kids, in particular two of them, are like mine.
Again, while my brother is not what he should be, he is a caring loving and supportive parent.
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