I haven't been to a formal since my last active one over 3 years ago. Girls have tried to get me to go, even as another active sister's "date." (It splits the per couple cost and you save money that way.)
I think this time around, we got a really good deal on a room at the Fairmont in SF. However if we upgraded to a bigger room, we wouldn't get this great deal. So after all the actives had signed up, only 3 alum and their dates could fit due to fire codes. Things like that happens sometimes but usually if alumns are planning on attending we give them a date to RSVP and pay and add them into the final event total. And like Phoenix said, it brings the bid price down since formal is separate from dues. (I think my cousin's sorority had their formal included in dues and everyone paid like $10.)
I've never seen anyone, active or alumn, crash our formal and demand food/favors... though I have seen guys do it unfortunately.
