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I just purviewed this whole thread today for the first time.
In my opinion, the crap talking should stop because you guys are both grown men and have very different opinions. Also, you don't know one another and are assuming way too many things about each other.
As for this thread, I think it is interesting and some people might want to read about Jeff's situation and they can learn about things other chapters do.
I have never heard about holding someone over and some of the terms you guys are using. I feel for Jeff because I have been in the same situation as him. My fresh year I never really hung around because I was focused on school and I was almost black balled because of it (I did not know this until my soph year). I was very popular but I partied too much in high school and made sure academics came first in college.
Luckily, I was not blackballed but I did not have the easiest associate experience because I did not get to know the brothers. My advice for you Jeff is you need to participate in more social activities and get to know the brothers better because it sounds like you are not doing that. This does not mean go drinking or getting crunk with them but this means doing social activities with them such as: playing sports, watching movies, going to a concert and so forth. Social life is very important with fraternities and it is what you will be spending the majority of your time doing with your fraternity brothers, your brothers should be able to see the social side of you.
At the same time, its great to really care about the fraternity and show an intense passion as an associate, I really admire that. You should definitely stick with it because you will gain leadership experience and learn about a great fraternity. Like I said, stick with it but do not be this chapters puppet, or have them keep screwing with you. I understand what GZ said because if my chapter did something like this, which we don't, that means they don't want you and you should get the hell out of there.
Also, Jeff you sound really indecisive and that could be a problem, you need to make a firm decision about your situation and stick with it. Obviously, it sounds like you want to stay and there is a chance all of this will work it, then so be it.
Overall, I definitely agree with some of the things GZ says, I have no clue about his chapters history or anything like that but he basically says what many people are afraid to say. This board is sometimes to optimistic and does not live in reality.
At the same time, I really like what the brother from Texas says, Lenoxxx. Sorry if I get your name wrong, but he knows his shit and should be respected because he has been in the fraternity much longer. Maybe other brothers can learn about different sides and perspectives related to Jeff's situation and form their own opinion about it. This board should be open to all members to say what they want but nobody should be insulted, lets save all the insults for a discussion about FIJI.
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