Recommendations -- Some Questions
 

Hi, everyone. :)

This is my very first post (though I've lurked forever), but it's an important one.

My cousin has decided to go to Very Big SEC School. It was her first choice, and she's thrilled, and I'm thrilled! She definitely wants to rush. I know she needs recs, and I want her to be able to maximize her options.

Can I write a rec for her for my sorority? Can my friends who've met her write her recs for their sororities? Or does it have to be done through the alumnae associations?

These questions may be ignorant, but I'm a total beginner at this. At my alma mater, I never even thought about rush until my friends convinced me to go to the sign-up (and I'm glad I went!).

Thanks for your help :)

A rec can be written by any alum to one of her GLO Chapters. They do not need to go through an official alum association. Some of the NPC orgs allow actives to write recs as long as it is to a different Chapter than she is affiliated with.

Recs coming from people who know a PNM very, very well are worth far more than from someone who just met a girl a time or two which is what often happens with alum associations. Presumably you would only recommend someone of high quality to become a member of your own organization.

As long as you are all initiated, you can write a rec. Your recs carry the same weight as an alum.
A little advice though, make sure and your friends write it like an alum would, not using slang or impropper English. I remember reading some recs in college that were rather "valley girl" sounding.

To the OP, I don't know how Chi O recs are like (a form? if you have to write a letter? etc.), but if you need help, it'd be a good idea to ask help from an alum, preferably one who's seasoned in writing recs. I know there are several of them on GreekChat.

I know most (if not all) NPCs don't officially recognize cousins as legacies, but I'm sure a letter introducing her to the Chi Omega chapter on her campus wouldn't hurt.

There was a thread with a list of NPC groups that allow alumnae and collegiates from other chapters to write recs and a list that only allow alumnae. Anyone know where that thread is?

http://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=75639

To the Chi O OP, I didn't see Chi O listed in the start of the thread, and carnation mentioned that 2 signatures are needed.

Thanks, everyone. I am an alum -- the two-signature issue won't be a problem, since she knows a few of my sisters.

I feel badly, though, b/c my family seems to think I'm pushing her to focus on my house. While I think she'd be a wonderful Chi O, I'd never do that -- I know next to nothing about her future school and have no idea what the best fit would be for her.

In any case, I'll use all this info well. Thanks again!

As long as she doesn't think you're pushing her to join Chi O, that's all that matters. I'm sure she'd appreciate any help she could get as far as recs from women that you know (and maybe know her too), which will definitely show her that you're not trying to pressure her to join Chi O (though I'm sure you'd be thrilled if she did!).

just wanted to make it clear that not all sororities allow collegians to write a recommendation. some do allow a collegian to write a rec. and have an alumnae co-sign with her, while others allow only alumnae to write a rec.

the best way to prove to your family that you want your cousin to find the best fit for her on her campus, is to assist her in securing recs. to all the chapters at her school. you can help her by explaining how recruitment works(in general) and offering to give her advice on her outfits should she ask for your assistance. direct your cousin to greekchat and have her read the recruitment thread originated by southerntheta which is wonderful advice for pnms.

good luck to your cousin-please be sure and let us know how her recruitment goes in the fall!

I think a bunch of GCers (myself included) initially interpretted the "Can I write a rec?" as "I'm a collegiate, can I write a rec?" and glazed over the "alma mater" context cue of her original post. The OP is an alum. Her question was if she could write a rec (as an individual) or does the rec have to come through an alumnae association. The answer is yes, she can write a rec for her cousin without having to go through an alumnae association, although for Chi Omega, 2 signatures are required.

ETA:
I understand if you've had bad experiences with collegiate-written recs, but I found the bolded part insulting (even though I am an alumna) because you're implying that 18-22 year-olds can't write a professional document. You didn't even spell improper correctly.

Perhaps you never saw a rec that went something like:

Dear chapter sisses!

OMG my cuz Fifi is coming 2 rush and u have to give her a bid! Fifi will be the perfect Upsilon Zeta because she is SO fly and was a cheerleader! Also Fifi's big brother BooBoo is a Tri Omicron and u now how HOTTTT those guys are!

Bid Fifi!

ITB,
Susie Supersis Alumnae

Can I save this as a template to use for all my recs this summer? It would save a lot of time with the whole typing out of whole words and all.

Have you SEEN how some people post on here? I realize that many people don't think they need to be formal on a messageboard, but their attempts to be informal come out looking about as literate as a monkey. You can tell that these people couldn't write a 5 paragraph essay without a grammar mistake to save their lives.

Of course I've seen how some people post like they're using AIM or sending a text message. Much of the time, they're trolls. I totally agree that typing like that in any other context makes it hard to take people seriously when they ask questions.

Like I said, I'm sure every once in a while, a collegiate will write a rec with abbreviated words, slang, incomplete sentences, and give stupid reasons for recommending the PNM, but is every rec from a collegiate like that? I seriously doubt it.

What I found insulting was that a generalization was made that ONLY alumnae know how to write a rec in standard American English because Benzgirl said, "write it like an alum". She could have said, "make sure the rec sounds professional and proofread it." The vast majority of GC collegiate posters DO post in full words and sentences.

LOL! Yup, I've seen some of those before!