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pledge class not getting along
I was wondering if anyone else's pledge class just didn't get along from the getgo and how you guys resolved your pledge class' drama.
I'm currently pledging and unfortunately the pledge class is making me wonder if going through a month+ of these girls is going to leave me with any sanity left. :( Anyone have any stories to share? |
Are you saying that you don't get along with your pledge class or the whole pledge class doesn't get along with each other (i.e. there's a split of some sort)?
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Not every pledge class will get along, if anyone spends that much time together (outside of the military, which i know not too much about) people are BOUND to get on each other's nerves. My pledge class and I got along fairly well, but we def had our moments. One of my littles, her pledge class fought tooth and nail, it took us sitting the girls down and talking it out in order to work things out, and now they get along well (they graduated, but remain close)
I would talk to your new member educator, your big, or someone you trust (member at large?) about the problems and really truly try to work through these things. I always told my girls that in life, you won't get along with everyone all the time. We are all different. It is important to learn to cope and to work things out rather than running away or causing more problems (talking behind backs, etc) (not that I'm saying you are, its just a common thing) |
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Once you get out of school and into the working world, you will find the same thing. I work in an organization where in some departments no one gets along. In others, there is a dichotomy. In ours, even though there are a few that get under my skin, we all get along. What you are describing is the story of life. Think of it as good preperation for your future. |
Your pledge class isn't the be-all, end-all of your chapter. Yes, you will all have gone through the same experiences together (recruitment, initiation, etc...) but that doesn't mean you'll all be BFF. Are there other women in your chapter with whom you get along better?
My pledge class of 22ish was extremely divided. There were 7 girls who did everything together and ostracized the rest of the class (save a few girls), there were another 4-5 who were very close and then there were the rest of us who just kind of did our own thing. I was much closer to women who were two and three years older than me and the pledge classes below mine than I was to the majority of my pledge class. As with anything, your experience is what you make of it. |
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Most of the girls initiated my year ended up dropping or transfering schools. Of the ones that are left, there are only 2 that I'm relatively close with...my best friends in the chapter are either older or younger than I am. I get along with the rest of the girls from my pledge class, but we certainly don't hang out in our free time. And thats OK, they're still nice ladies, thats just how some things go!
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Your pledgemistress/pledge trainer/NM coordinator/whatever she's called - is she at the meetings or running them? She should be trying to diffuse some of the tension. It's really her job, not the president's, to do so. If your sorority isn't that large then you're not going to be tied to your pledge class the rest of your college career - just be civil to each other long enough to get through pledging and then you can hang out with whatever sisters you want. |
Why doesn't each NM have dinner alone with another NM? Or other stuff? Set up different activities so each NM gets to spend time with another NM so they get to know each other better? I know this would be tough to do with bigger schools.
My pledge class of 10 did not get along at all. We couldn't have been any different. It took a while for us to get our act together, but in the end it all worked out. I still text message my pledge sisters to this day when I hear Mary J. Blige's song with the lyrics "NO MORE DRAMA IN OUR LIVES!":p |
Is creating or fueling girl drama a trend?
This question came up in conversation the other day ...I'm not sure. what do you all think? one opinion was that some of the "reality" tv shows that feature college age women are making fighting between girlfriends seem like a normal activity or something you do to get attention.
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When a class is that small (mine was 6, but we all got along famously), one tends to think the chapter is also small (mine never got above 22 while I was there). What percentage of these women will be running the chapter in 3-4 years is a definite consideration. |
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