Guy Problems
 

I need some advice. Ok, here is my problem. I met this one guy the same night that one of my friends met him. I thought that he was dateable the first time I met him, but I didn't say anything to my friend about it. However, she told me that she kind of liked him. But she also liked these 2 other guys. Now, she doesn't like one of them but she still likes 2...including the one I like. And, she likes Brian (the guy I also like)more than the other guy. Now here is the hard part of the story. I found out that Brian likes me, but I really don't want to hurt my friend. I always promised myself that a guy would never get in the way of a friendship. I didn't talk to her about it yet, but do you think it would be okay if I asked her if it was ok if I went out with him and if she had a problem with it, then I wouldn't go out with him. Or do you think I should forget about him completely? I wouldn't even consider dating him if she didn't like a new guy all the time, but I am just confused. Any advice???

Although I totally believe that guys are nobody's property, I have been in your friend's situation before. My best friend and I liked the same guy. He liked her and they started dating. I did not talk to her for at least 3 months and our friendship was definitely hurt by it. That was 4 years ago and now, believe it or not, we're better friends than we ever were before. But, that's only because I've had time to heal from what happened. You're in a tough spot right now. I think it's great that the guy you really like thinks the same way about you but you also have your friend who you don't want to hurt. No matter what, she will be hurt. I think you need to decide whether she's the type of person to forgive and forget or if she holds grudges. Would she be ok with it? Even if you talk to her about it and she says that she's ok, she might be lying to make you feel better. So, be careful. Also, if the roles were reversed, would you be mad if your friend started dating him? I wish you the best of luck; it's a difficult situation.