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-   -   Scared (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=83284)

LAgirly 12-21-2006 08:40 PM

Scared
 
Hey everyone... I've been on greekchat several times and I finally just registered. The first time I came on was AFTER i went through formal rush this past fall semester. I wish I had found this site sooner.
Anyway, I went through rush and the sorority I just felt at home with did not give me a first invitation back. I thought I had really connected with those girls. It was heart breaking. I gave the other sororities on campus a chance and really looked into them too... but I just felt that Phi Mu was home. I went to the other houses and were impressed with their presentations but sometimes you just KNOW where you would feel the best. Mind you, the other sororities left were awesome, but again, I just felt like Phi Mu was home.
I wasn't sure why I got cut but I thought a large factor might have been my grades. I didn't have the high school minimum that they had wanted. At least I HOPE that was the reason I was cut. I've worked hard this past semester and got a 3.25. I was also told by some girls that I just didn't know enough people. Spring rush is going to start probably as soon as school begins and I want to try rushing again for Phi Mu but I'm scared. I don't think I can go through that heartbreak again.
Any advice or pointers would be awesome.

Dee34 12-21-2006 10:34 PM

Good Luck!
 
Good Luck during spring recruitment! Happy Holidays!

DeltaBetaBaby 12-21-2006 11:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LAgirly (Post 1373958)
Hey everyone... I've been on greekchat several times and I finally just registered. The first time I came on was AFTER i went through formal rush this past fall semester. I wish I had found this site sooner.
Anyway, I went through rush and the sorority I just felt at home with did not give me a first invitation back. I thought I had really connected with those girls. It was heart breaking. I gave the other sororities on campus a chance and really looked into them too... but I just felt that Phi Mu was home. I went to the other houses and were impressed with their presentations but sometimes you just KNOW where you would feel the best. Mind you, the other sororities left were awesome, but again, I just felt like Phi Mu was home.
I wasn't sure why I got cut but I thought a large factor might have been my grades. I didn't have the high school minimum that they had wanted. At least I HOPE that was the reason I was cut. I've worked hard this past semester and got a 3.25. I was also told by some girls that I just didn't know enough people. Spring rush is going to start probably as soon as school begins and I want to try rushing again for Phi Mu but I'm scared. I don't think I can go through that heartbreak again.
Any advice or pointers would be awesome.

Is spring recruitment informal? Do you know how many chapters are participating? I will give you the advice that we give all PNM's: HAVE AN OPEN MIND. If you give other chapters a chance, you may be surprised by one of them. Going in with your heart set on Phi Mu isn't fair to the other chapters or fair to yourself.

honeychile 12-21-2006 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 1374016)
Is spring recruitment informal? Do you know how many chapters are participating? I will give you the advice that we give all PNM's: HAVE AN OPEN MIND. If you give other chapters a chance, you may be surprised by one of them. Going in with your heart set on Phi Mu isn't fair to the other chapters or fair to yourself.

What she said!

Also, be sure to mention that you've been working 24/7 to bring up your grades! Many chapters require a fairly high GPA from your high school, but realize that the first term of your freshman year is the real acid test.

Keep your eyes open, and good luck!

kappa_babe 12-22-2006 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LAgirly (Post 1373958)
Hey everyone... I've been on greekchat several times and I finally just registered. The first time I came on was AFTER i went through formal rush this past fall semester. I wish I had found this site sooner.
Anyway, I went through rush and the sorority I just felt at home with did not give me a first invitation back. I thought I had really connected with those girls. It was heart breaking. I gave the other sororities on campus a chance and really looked into them too... but I just felt that Phi Mu was home. I went to the other houses and were impressed with their presentations but sometimes you just KNOW where you would feel the best. Mind you, the other sororities left were awesome, but again, I just felt like Phi Mu was home.
I wasn't sure why I got cut but I thought a large factor might have been my grades. I didn't have the high school minimum that they had wanted. At least I HOPE that was the reason I was cut. I've worked hard this past semester and got a 3.25. I was also told by some girls that I just didn't know enough people. Spring rush is going to start probably as soon as school begins and I want to try rushing again for Phi Mu but I'm scared. I don't think I can go through that heartbreak again.
Any advice or pointers would be awesome.

Just give the other chapters a chance because my best friend was in the same situation during our rush she wanted to be a Chi-O thats were she felt home but they cut her on pref night and she ended up going Pi Beta Phi and she loves it. if Phi Mu cuts you again just give another chapter a chance! Another question have you met anymore Phi Mu's since the last rush because that would be a big plus. Best of Luck with Recruitment

BadCat25 12-22-2006 07:25 PM

Open Mind
 
PLEASE keep an open mind and give the other houses a chance. I rushed last year and just knew there was only one house for me. When they cut me I was going to drop out but my Rho Chi talked me out of it. I ended up in a sorority that I just love and wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

Duchovnysfan 12-27-2006 07:28 AM

Yes what everyone else said! Do keep an open mind b/c when I went through rush, I had my heart set on one sorority, while I didn't have an issue with the other chapters, I knew I wanted to be in that sorority. However, rush happens and let's just say it truly opened my eyes. Go in expecting nothing and hoping for the best. It helps you to have a good attitude and a better outlook for the whole process. Most of all, you can have a great time when you are there b/c in the end (whether you get into a sorority or not) it's all about meeting people and making friends while having a blast at the same time.

Good luck and enjoy recruitment, it's truly an experience! ;)

FatalDSTination 12-27-2006 03:20 PM

If at first you dont succeed.... u know the rest. If it's really in your heart, dont give up so easily.

AOII_LB93 12-28-2006 12:07 PM

FatalDST,
While that may be the case with NPHC organizations, that isn't always how it works in the NPC.

And to the OP, no you don't know why you were cut, and in reality you probably never will. Membership selection is a private matter for NPC organizations. People can speculate until the end of time as to why they were cut, but they may never find out why. As to what everyone else said, keep an open mind.

violetpretty 12-28-2006 12:42 PM

How long did you stay in recruitment? It sounds like you only went through the first round and fell in love with Phi Mu.

Don't get me wrong, I know this happens, because after our first round, there were two sororities that I was in love with. One of them did not invite me to preference and I changed my mind about the other and attended other chapters' preference parties. Moral of the story: things change after the first round.

Now that your grades are up, you're a much better candidate for ALL of the chapters. Phi Mu may or may not be a good fit for you in the spring, but there could be other chapters that could be home too. By all means, try for Phi Mu, but go to some other chapters too that you liked or even felt so-so about in the fall.

FatalDSTination 12-28-2006 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AOII_LB93 (Post 1375614)
FatalDST,
While that may be the case with NPHC organizations, that isn't always how it works in the NPC.

AOII, are you saying with NPC, you cant try again if you dont make it the first time?:confused:

33girl 12-28-2006 03:00 PM

You can rush again, but depending on the school, your chances of receiving a bid may be very limited. Also, while some NPC groups do participate in alumnae initiation, it is nothing near what the NPHC groups do as far as members joining as graduates.

Also, in NPC, it is generally NOT a good idea to focus on one sorority only as a rushee, while of course in the NPHC it is just the opposite.

CutiePie2000 12-28-2006 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1375674)
You can rush again, but depending on the school, your chances of receiving a bid may be very limited.

Co-sign.
Not to be harsh, but in some cases, a repeat rushee can be seen as "damaged goods".

FatalDSTination 12-28-2006 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1375674)
You can rush again, but depending on the school, your chances of receiving a bid may be very limited. Also, while some NPC groups do participate in alumnae initiation, it is nothing near what the NPHC groups do as far as members joining as graduates.

Also, in NPC, it is generally NOT a good idea to focus on one sorority only as a rushee, while of course in the NPHC it is just the opposite.

Gotcha, thanks! :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by CutiePie2000 (Post 1375678)
Co-sign.
Not to be harsh, but in some cases, a repeat rushee can be seen as "damaged goods".

Ouch...

AOII_LB93 12-28-2006 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FatalDSTination (Post 1375671)
AOII, are you saying with NPC, you cant try again if you dont make it the first time?:confused:

Not at all, I was saying it's not always good to pick just one and stick with that one like it seems people do for the NPHC. For instance if I were to intake for NPHC, I have known I want to be an ABC all my life and will wait until my time comes...that's not how we do it in the NPC. 33girl said it just right...
We had girls who kept coming back to our recruitment events (open rounds of COR) in whom we had no interest and made it clear they would not get bids, but they kept coming back, every time we had open recruitment.

There are some people who just don't fit with certain chapters. That's life. Harsh, but true.


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