Joining another sorority
 

Hey all, I haven't been around here since October, but I posted a few times about starting a new sorority and the rumors that were being spread about us (our campus-wide nickname was the "Hitler Youth" because of our colors). If you remember that, things are better currently, but may get worse. Anyway, I have a question.

Our main founder called me at about 830 this morning, to tell me that one of our girls, who has been in this sorority (Psyche) pretty much since the beginning, is interested in pledging another sorority. This girl, let's call her C, did not tell any of us that are in Psyche. We found out because a friend of ours was at the all-Greek rush party earlier this week and saw her hanging out with some of the girls, then our current "president's" friend told her that C said she wanted to join Alpha Beta Chi. Then another friend of our president's also confirmed that C would like to join ABX. C has still not told any of us this. Now, C's GPA is nowhere near high enough to pledge, she would have to get at least a 3.0 this semester to pledge next semester and it's doubtful that will happen at this point. But it's more that she's interested.

I'm here to ask those of you on here, what we should do. You are all far more experienced with Greek Life and have maybe either dealt with this sort of situation, or know someone that has, and has a better understanding. Right now, we want to have a mandatory meeting within the next week, with C, to find out her intentions. But what would our best approach be? C knows some of our personal secrets, and I don't know what she would do to make these other girls like her, but I know her well enough to say that she could very well tell them some things about each of us, that we do not want public knowledge.

It is my understanding that when you join a sorority, it's for life and you don't go a try to join another. Am I right in saying this? But she is doing exactly that, with a sorority that has a few women that have made it known that they strongly dislike us. What should we do at this point?

Thanks for any help.

Re: Joining another sorority
 

Unless you are an NPC group, she can join another group (NPC, NPHC or local). I would imagine she has reasons but it is not a chapter decision to meet with her. Your president or VP should dicreetly speak to her. Knowing your secrets does not make her less of a candidate for another group and unless she has had a falling out with your group, she probably will take your secrets to the grave.

Denise

I quit the local sorority I helped found. (Hence the name change, for anyone who might have wondered.) I had a serious problem with two of the members and couldn't take it any more, so I moved out and quit. I then started hanging out with another GLO on campus, and really enjoyed it. I went through formal recruitment for the NPC groups and ended up accepting a bid from Phi Mu. I would never tell any of the "secrets" of the sorority I was in before, even though there were very few secrets to tell. I also try to avoid badmouthing the members I had problems with, and I am still very close to a couple of the girls. For me, the problem was that I was sick of being treated badly by so-called friends and I had changed so much since freshman year when we founded the group. I couldn't be happier where I am now.

If this girl is really your sister, you should go to her directly and find out what's going on. Don't yell, just calmly tell her you've been hearing whatever, and let her tell you what's going on. It honestly sounds like a bunch of rumors, but if it is true, well, there isn't a lot you can do. As long as you aren't NPC (and I assume you're a local) she can join another GLO if she wants, assuming she has the grades, etc.

Sorry to hear about your problems, but I can sympathize with both of you.

Whatever you decide, the other sorority may have a problem with C's apparent lack of loyalty. I wonder if C has really thought this through.

/mini reply, i'm in a rush :)