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-   -   Am I Being Selfish? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=74199)

WCUgirl 01-19-2006 01:21 PM

Am I Being Selfish?
 
DELETE!

Eclipse 01-19-2006 01:41 PM

I don't think you are being selfish. Marriage is about compromise on both parts. I think the people you spoke with are used to the wife/woman always being the one to compromisewhich is why they assumed you would not go now

33girl 01-19-2006 01:43 PM

Re: Am I Being Selfish?
 
Quote:

Originally posted by AXiD670
Is there something wrong with me for expecting to still be able to go? Am I being selfish? I don't understand why people assume I will give up on my dreams because we're moving to a new city.
You are not being selfish AT ALL. If the roles were reversed, everyone would EXPECT you to quit your new job so that hubby could go to law school. Double standards are so laaaaaame.

It sounds like he is supportive of you and that's what counts, so tell everyone else to step firmly into the 1960's and not be so jealous of what a cool hubby you have.

Rudey 01-19-2006 01:50 PM

Nah I think he'd be OK with it if it means more bling for the family. Buy him a nice watch and a plasma TV and I'm sure he'll be a big supporter of the move.

-Rudey

valkyrie 01-19-2006 02:16 PM

You're not being selfish.

I do find it odd that he moved for a new job a month ago while knowing that he might move again this fall if you go to law school elsewhere. Why would he move to a new city for what might be less than a year?

kddani 01-19-2006 02:22 PM

I don't think you're being selfish. I think the people who are telling you not to go for it are being old-fashioned and sexist. Especially something like law school- being a lawyer is still a man's job in some people's eyes.

It sounds like your husband must have a job where he can move from city to city easily?

Peaches-n-Cream 01-19-2006 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
You're not being selfish.

I do find it odd that he moved for a new job a month ago while knowing that he might move again this fall if you go to law school elsewhere. Why would he move to a new city for what might be less than a year?

I agree.

I don't think people are being sexist when they ask if you are still going to law school. Maybe they just thought that if you moved to a new city for your husband's job, you might stay there for a while. That's what I would think.

KSigkid 01-19-2006 03:22 PM

You're not being selfish at all - you and your husband know what the deal is, and that's all that counts.

BobbyTheDon 01-19-2006 04:00 PM

Eh, maybe you are being a little selfish. But he knew what he was getting into when he married you. :)


Hah hah hah! Ho ho ho! Merrrrrrrrry Christmas!

AchtungBaby80 01-19-2006 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AXiD670
It just frustrated me to hear that people thought I would conform to a double-standard.
That would really tick me off, too. But as long as your husband supports you in going to law school, what everybody else says doesn't matter because that's between you all.

wrigley 01-19-2006 09:00 PM

You are not selfish. I suspect the ladies at the dinner may be a bit envious because you are pursuing your dreams and for whatever reason chose not to follow theirs, whether by happenstance or by husband. It's a shame that they weren't more supportive of you.

Indeed there is a double standard out there but rules were made to be broken. I bet their husbands got more than an earful that night after they found out how supportive MightyMike is for you.

Good luck on getting into the law school of your choice!!!:)

GeekyPenguin 01-20-2006 01:20 AM

I don't think you're being selfish at all.

I once had a lady ask me if I was going to law school so I could be my boyfriend's secretary (he's an attorney). I told her I was going so he could be mine.

wrigley 01-20-2006 10:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AXiD670
Haha, that's awesome!

Well, either my mom could tell she really irritated me, or she reads GreekChat (hi, mom!). She sent me an email this morning going on and on about how some women have husbands who won't support them, I'm lucky to have a husband who will work, I shouldn't go to law school at the cost of sacrificing my marriage, God has given a clear message in the Bible that the wife should fit in with the husband's plans, blah, blah, blah.

I guess I'm going to hell. :(

Nah, you're not going to hell.

Email mom thanking her for reminding you that it may be true that the wife should fit in with the husband's plans. Your husband's plan is for you to go to law school. :D.

madmax 01-20-2006 03:20 PM

Why didn't you wait for the application results before you moved?

BobbyTheDon 01-20-2006 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AXiD670
Haha, that's awesome!

Well, either my mom could tell she really irritated me, or she reads GreekChat (hi, mom!). She sent me an email this morning going on and on about how some women have husbands who won't support them, I'm lucky to have a husband who will work, I shouldn't go to law school at the cost of sacrificing my marriage, God has given a clear message in the Bible that the wife should fit in with the husband's plans, blah, blah, blah.

I guess I'm going to hell. :(


Dude, that is some fucked up stuff.


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