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-   -   Confessions Of A Mid20s' Rusher (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=70187)

Jestor 09-08-2005 05:40 PM

Confessions Of A Mid20s' Rusher
 
When I was coming out of high school, I really wanted to be a Greek.

My first year of college was at the University of Minnesota and for some reason I didn't rush. To this day I don't know why. It likely turned out to be a good thing though, because U of MN was a bad fit for me overall, and after a frustrating year, I returned home to Wisconsin and began attending the University of Wisconsin-Parkside. Greek life there is so weak as to nearly be nonexistant, so I did not rush there.. that and the guys who I knew were Greek weren't the kind of guys I got along with very well.

Parkside also was a bad fit, so eventually I changed to a community college in my hometown of Racine. There, I finally got my act together and got my associate degree in Marketing. Needless to say, being a comm college, Greeks were nonexistant.

Back to Parkside for another year, where I put together two semesters on the Dean's List to restore my GPA to a 2.6. With my academic integrity restored, I decided to transfer to the University of Wyoming, a school I'd looked at in my senior year of high school before deciding to go closer to home.

Rush week for fraternities has started this week. Out of the four houses I visited last night, one I don't want to join because they don't have a house. Cool group of guys, but I want the fraternity house experience.

Another house, the guys and I meshed okay, but to my part, they seemed very arrogant and egotistical. Not the kind of situation I want to be involved with.

Third house, the guy who toured me around seemed cool and I'll admit to having liked the selectiveness of the fraternity. Furthermore, the ideals they were looking for (or so they said) were ones that I matched up with perfectly. So I went back to my dorm to get some cash for the buy-in of the poker night they were having, thinking okay, this is who I'm going to rush hardcore for. Went back and I was ignored entirely. It was like I wasn't even there.

So okay, no problem. The fourth house, I'd meshed really well and was quite conversational with the guys there during the 20 minute meeting, something that I'm not usually. So after leaving House #3, I went back to this fourth house and talked with some more of the members, some I'd met during the visit, others who were new to me. It's a house I have a really, really good feeling about and who will definitely be on my list of 3 prefs for Friday.

Tonight we tour the other four houses.

I have to admit though, I'm awfully nervous. I mean, here I am, I'm 26 years old and I'm rushing for the first time. Like I explained to the houses, creditswise I'm a senior, but because a lot of the credits were garbage ones and lower division, I'm here for at least another two years.

But then I've read on this board about how the fraternities favour underclassman over us relatively old goats. So I have to confess I'm a little worried that my age and time remaining might impact my chances, though as I say, I got on really well with the guys in that last-mentioned house. Being a transfer student I fear may affect the probability in a negative fashion as well.

Still, I hold out hope that the dream a starry-eyed 18-year old had and that still burns brightly on in this older and wiser 26-year old man may yet come to frutition... and that it will come to pass that I'll become Greek and fall in with a great bunch of guys that I get on real well with and have an absolute blast with.

Thanks for listening to the bleatings of this old goat. ;)

Lindz928 09-08-2005 05:45 PM

Where is Kitso right now???

If he reads this, he might be able to give you some good insight. I'm pretty sure he joined Sigma Nu during his 5th year of college.

I think you should point out that you will still be around for 2 more years. I think that will probably have more of an impact that your age.

Good luck! :)

Jestor 09-08-2005 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lindz928
Where is Kitso right now???

If he reads this, he might be able to give you some good insight. I'm pretty sure he joined Sigma Nu during his 5th year of college.

I think you should point out that you will still be around for 2 more years. I think that will probably have more of an impact that your age.

Good luck! :)

Ironically Sigma Nu is one of the four houses scheduled to be visited tonight. :D

And yeah, I"ve been pointing out to all the houses that I've got at least two years left... so we'll see what happens. :)

And thanks for the luck!

SmartBlondeGPhB 09-08-2005 06:09 PM

From your other post, you have some very strong groups to choose from.

The only things I know about fraternity rush I learned from stories my ex-bf told. And they all had to do with drinking, parties and guys you could hang with. WAY more laid back than our process..........

But good luck!

dgdramadawg 09-08-2005 06:46 PM

Re: Confessions Of A Mid20s' Rusher
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Jestor
But then I've read on this board about how the fraternities favour underclassman over us relatively old goats. So I have to confess I'm a little worried that my age and time remaining might impact my chances, though as I say, I got on really well with the guys in that last-mentioned house. Being a transfer student I fear may affect the probability in a negative fashion as well.
My ex-fiance rushed at 24 and got a bid from the fraternity he liked best... however, he ended up deciding not to go through with it because the guys in the house were mostly 18-21. As an older rusher, I don't think he experienced any discrimination (at least, not the level that a girl would have at UGA), but he found it hard to find a group that was at his maturity level when he was 6 years older than the people he would have been pledging with.

Good luck and have fun! I hope you find a house that fits you.

TSteven 09-08-2005 08:24 PM

Re: Confessions Of A Mid20s' Rusher
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Jestor
I have to admit though, I'm awfully nervous. I mean, here I am, I'm 26 years old and I'm rushing for the first time. Like I explained to the houses, creditswise I'm a senior, but because a lot of the credits were garbage ones and lower division, I'm here for at least another two years.

But then I've read on this board about how the fraternities favour underclassman over us relatively old goats. So I have to confess I'm a little worried that my age and time remaining might impact my chances, though as I say, I got on really well with the guys in that last-mentioned house. Being a transfer student I fear may affect the probability in a negative fashion as well.

If the guys like you, and feel you will be a good fit with the chapter, your age and class year should not be an issue.

The only issues that might work against you is if there is some sort of campus or chapter imposed quota/total system for the fraternities.

I am only aware of two campuses that had (have?) a limit to the number of pledges each fraternity chapter could take - Arkansas and Oklahoma. My understanding is that this was something similar to NPC rush where each chapter was only able to take a certain number of pledges during formal recruitment. Frankly, I'm not sure if either campus still limits the number.

The other issue is if a specific chapter has set a limit on the number of bids the chapter wants to extend. This is usually set internally and may not be made known or publicized.

If either of these scenarios apply at Wyoming, then a chapter may be *more likely* to extend a bid to an underclassmen. But again, not always. If you are a good fit, then your age and class year should not be an issue. And depending on the needs of the chapter, they might actually work to your advantage.

Best of luck.

James 09-08-2005 10:56 PM

If you get cut it won't be because of your age. I have heard of men in their forties getting bids, its rare but its more rare because men in their 40's usually don't come out . . .

Men don't have an upper limit of people we can take generally fraternities don't have to show preference to someone younger or in an earlier year . . the frat can take you both :)

If you are presentable looking, cool, with a youthful attitude you should have little to no problem.

Just be friendly.

mmcat 09-08-2005 11:46 PM

good luck to you...

Jestor 09-09-2005 12:58 AM

Thanks for all the support and encouragement guys and gals :)

So the second round of house touring was tonight.

I actually showed up two hours early because I got the time wrong and had to quit in the middle of my fantasy football draft, which irked me a bit, but it worked out okay because I went to the house I liked best from last night. They fed me supper and I hung out with them until it was time to do the second half of the house visits.

First house, cool bunch of guys, but because of some political issues that I later found out about tonight, a lot of their members quit. And no, I won't detail the issues because I don't feel this is the proper place for it. While I came to understand why, their presentation still bothered me. I know they need new blood, but they came across as being too desperate for new members and that was a huge turnoff for me.

Second house, easily the most beautiful on campus. I mean, we're talking I'd love to live in this house my whole life kind of beautiful, but the people there seemed a little stuck up and snobby, so that made me kinda meh.

Third house was obviously a fraternity that cared more about partying than anything else and gave short shrift to everything else. While I like partying, I want a well-rounded Greek experience, so thanks but no thanks.

Last house is situated away from the other fraternities and sororities. Not really what I wanted to be honest. I want to be at the centre of Greek life. Furthermore, the guys at that house were all pretty of a specific personality type that, while I get along pretty good with my friends who are of that type, they're fundamentally different from my own personality.

So after the visitations, I went back to the second house from tonight because the place was that damn beautiful that I felt myself compelled to go there and hang out. I did for about twenty minutes and chatted with some more guys. Then one of the sororities came by and filled the house, and I noticed something. All the girls stood around talking to each other and ignoring all the guys, who were making idle conversation and looking bored with each other while eyeing the girls.

At that point, I was like ".... 'kay, forget this. The sorority girls paired up with the fraternity I like best are a lot cooler and less gender-centric than this." (I'd noticed there seems to be an affiliation and correspondence with fraternities and sororities).

So back I go to my favourite house where they all greeted me again and I sat and listened to a couple guys in the house play guitar and sing. Then I joined in on the poker game that started up and learned two new variants of poker that I didn't know before. Even came out a buck ahead. :D

So yeah, my #1 frat from last night is even more clearly my top choice now and I put it on my preference form as my first selection. Number two was the gorgeous house fraternity. I couldn't help it, that's how much I loved the place. For my third choice, I just kind of closed my eyes and picked one at random, and it turned out to be House 4 from last night.

I'm feeling pretty good about my chances of getting into my first choice, because I seem to mesh really well with the guys there and most of them know my name by now, so there isn't that crack-slipping thing to worry about that I've heard about so far on here.

If I get a bid from them, I'll be ecstatic and accept right away. If I don't and get one from one or both of the other two, then I'll probably take most of the 72 hours before I decide, and really mull it over.

mmcat 09-09-2005 10:29 AM

good for you....

PenguinTrax 09-09-2005 11:48 AM

Sounds like you are really putting a lot of thought into this - here's wishing you the best!

valkyrie 09-09-2005 12:09 PM

Wow, good luck. It's not very often that I'm impressed by a rush thread, but I am now. I hope it goes well for you.

SmartBlondeGPhB 09-09-2005 12:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
Wow, good luck. It's not very often that I'm impressed by a rush thread, but I am now. I hope it goes well for you.
I agree. You have put a lot of thought into the whole thing.

Good Luck!

Jestor 09-09-2005 02:55 PM

Thanks again guys and gals :) I'm also pleased to hear that you guys are impressed with my rush thread.

And yes, I *have* put a lot of thought into this. My own mom, like some of the girls' mothers here, was a little leery of the fraternity thing as well because of the stereotypes associated with it, but has so far supported me in my rushing experience and has even been eager to hear updates on it. Dad doesn't have an opinion one way or the other I don't think, or at least he hasn't voiced it. ;)

Would I have put the same thought into it if I had rushed earlier in life? I don't know. I'd like to think I would have, but I've learned that as you get older, you get wiser, generally speaking. Besides which, as I think I mentioned earlier, without the life experiences that I've had since my first year (way back in '97-'98), I probably wouldn't have had a successful rush, due to being too shy and too socially inept.

So it all seems to be working out thus far. :)

Tonight is the male version of pref night. I honestly don't know for sure how that's going to break down precisely or even specifically what time it starts at. I'm going to go check the schedule when I hit the dining hall because the Greek recruitment teams have them as an advertisement insert at every table.

I do know that at 5, I'll be stopping by my first choice's event for the night.

So yeah, more updates later tonight. :D

Sistermadly 09-09-2005 05:53 PM

But what are you wearing? That's what I want to know!

(Heh. Just kidding. This is one recruitment thread I'm actually following with interest.)


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