Father seeks child between 2 worlds in Amish home
 

Anybody want to weigh in on this one?

Father seeks child between two worlds in an Amish home
By Paul Levy Minneapolis Star Tribune

Just 15 months old and wearing an Amish bonnet and light-brown dress made by her mother, barefoot Rachel Schrock sat on a bare wooden floor and cooed, a picture of innocence.

The toddler lives on a farm tucked away in the hills of west-central Wisconsin, where paved roads are oddities and horse-drawn buggies are more common than cars. Church bell-like vibrations of 3-foot-long wind chimes gently interrupted the silence. At the wooden steps by the door were matching leather boots filled with soil and sprouting flowers.

"We choose to live the simple, quiet life," said Samuel Schrock, who is married to Rachel's mother and listed himself as Rachel's father on her birth certificate.

But he is not Rachel's biological father, and her life has been anything but simple. A month ago, an Iowa judge predicted in court, "This little girl is going to have, at best, a very complicated life."

Rachel is the object of a custody battle pitting an Amish mother against an Iowa businessman more than twice her age, a clash of cultures that may be without precedent, an expert said.

Biological father

Rachel's undisputed biological father is Dieter Erdelt, 67, a first-generation German immigrant, a Roman Catholic, and the owner of an Oelwein, Iowa, greenhouse and landscaping company.

He said he has employed women from Amish communities just south of the Minnesota state line for years.

Although he was married, is the father of four grown children and is a grandfather, Erdelt became involved with one of his Amish employees, Edna Helmuth, now 30, more than two years ago.

"I didn't try to get Edna pregnant," said Erdelt, now divorced. "It happened. I still believe there is some reason that God gave me this child."

Living with her parents and siblings, Helmuth tried to keep her pregnancy secret. But five months into the pregnancy, she dropped a bombshell: She was going to get married.

Not to Erdelt. To Schrock, 25, an Amish carpenter from Wisconsin she had met at a wedding months before the affair with Erdelt began.

Schrock says now that he welcomed news of the pending birth. But according to court records, he told Edna that she would be "forgiven" and they could marry only if she confessed her pregnancy before an Amish congregation. She did.

The Schrocks were married before Rachel was born in a Waterloo, Iowa, hospital.

In a letter to Erdelt that was read in Buchanan County, Iowa, District Court, Edna Schrock wrote that Erdelt would be "our friend forever" and she would "definitely not exclude you from the child."

But Edna Schrock wanted to raise the baby on her terms, in a strictly Amish environment.

"We want her to grow up in our way of life," she said. No television, no radio, no telephones. "We don't want her to want that kind of stuff."

Offers of aid

A month before Rachel's birth, on March 17 last year, Erdelt sent the Schrocks a baby bed and offered to pay medical costs connected with Edna's pregnancy, according to court records. In the months that followed, Erdelt offered to provide health insurance for the child, monetary support, toys, clothing and other material gifts.

All offers were refused. Edna asked family members whether she should hide the baby from Erdelt, according to court documents. The Schrocks later told Erdelt they did not want him to visit Rachel on a recurring basis.

And then they moved to Wisconsin, a four-hour drive away--"Where they didn't think I'd find them," Erdelt said.

Publicly humiliated, in the midst of a divorce and with his greenhouse mysteriously burned to the ground, Erdelt said he became obsessed with seeing Rachel.

In September, a court granted his request for temporary visitation. But the Schrocks largely rebuffed his efforts to visit Rachel.

"I still have feelings for Edna and I think Samuel is a decent man," Erdelt said.

But he cared about his daughter enough to take the Schrocks to court. Last month, Judge K.D. Biner ruled that Rachel belonged in the custody of her mother and that Erdelt could visit, for now, for eight hours every other Sunday. He also ruled that, for now, Erdelt cannot take Rachel out of the Schrocks' home during visits.

Erdelt says he will appeal the verdict, asking that he be given more visitation time, if not custody.

Edna Schrock said that she prefers not to discuss her case in the media but that she has nothing to hide.

Re: Father seeks child between 2 worlds in Amish home
 

Erdelt's problem in this was not getting paternity established immediately.

Remove the religion factor and this is just like any other child paternity/visitation/custody case.

He is the biological father. He should pay support AND it is not the mother's RIGHT to deny that support to the child. Additionally, he is the biological father, barring any "unfitness" on his part, he is entitled to visitation and it should be allowed.

I just watched Devil's Playground, which is a documentary about Amish kids going off on their rumspringa. It was interesting.

I thought it was called "Amish in the City" ;)

Haha, how did it end? I had to take it back to the video place before I watched the last twenty minutes.

Anyway, while I understand that legally the man has rights to visit his child, I think there is a degree of selfishness in his behavior. There is no way a kid can be raised in both the Amish and non-Amish worlds and not come out supremely screwed up. And who's going to have to deal with the fallout of that? The mother, who is both the primary caregiver (and will end up being the primary disciplinarian) and much younger -- this dude could easily be DEAD before his child reaches adulthood. He doesn't seem to understand or respect the Amish culture very much, either, given that the article reports "Erdelt offered to provide health insurance for the child, monetary support, toys, clothing and other material gifts." Now, the offer for health insurance I can understand, even though the Amish don't use health insurance -- it's understandable to want to see your child "safe." But the other offers mystify me -- he wants to provide his kid with toys and clothing and money in a culture that allows children few toys and even then only simple ones, only simple Amish clothing, et cetera? Why?

Now I agree that there is also an element of selfishness in the mother's behavior, but I feel like that has more to do with an understanding of how this child is going to be affected by the dual cultures, whereas I don't see that with the father. I certainly think he should be allowed to visit his child, but I think that further involvement in her life gets pretty tricky.

If nothing else, if he's still alive when it gets to her rumspringa, maybe she can go live with him then. ;)