D&D Random
 

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MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

D&D
Stephen Lynch

i got my twelve sided die and im ready to roll
with a wizard and my goblin crew,
my friends are comin over to my moms basement
bringin funyuns and the mountain dew,
i got a big broad sword made out of cardboard
and that stereo's a-pumpin zeppelin,
its that time of the night we turn on the black light
let the dungeons and the dragons begin,

it's d&d!
fighting with the legends of yore.
it's d&d!
never kissed lady before (nope).

now the lord of the rings the dark crystal and things,
we use these as a reference tool,
and when we put on our cloaks and tell warlock jokes we're the coolest kids in the school...

no we're not
i know

now tiche's a real bastard but a fair dungeon master,
he's got hit points and charisma to lend,
i rehearse in my room or what i call the dragons tomb when im not im with my girlfriend,
its d&d...wait...

youve got a girlfriend?
yeah. yeah...no.

its d&d!
warriors that terrify.
its d&d!
virgins til the day we...

1,2,3,4!

die!

So this is a really embarassing story, but I'm going to tell it anyway.

About a week ago, my GC friend (who shall remain nameless) and I realized we had no clue what D&D actually was. Like, was it a video game, or a card game, or a board game, or what? So we went to the D&D website to try to figure it out. And while we were there, we got kind of distracted and took a quiz on, if you were playing D&D, what race should you be? I am supposed to be a female gnome bard.


And I'm still not completely sure HOW you play this game.

I've got the dungeon Master's Guide
I've got a 12-sided die
I've got Kitty Pryde
and Nightcrawler too
Waiting there for me
yes I do, I do
I've got posters on the wall
My favorite rock group KISS
I've got Ace Frehley
I've got Peter Criss
Waiting there for me
yes I do, I do
In the garage
I feel safe
No one cares about my ways
In the garage
Where I belong
No one hears me sing this song
In the garage
I've got an electric guitar
I play my stupid songs
I write these stupid words
and I love every one
Waiting there for me
Yes I do, I do

D&D casts life-long spell
By Manuelita Beck
Published: Thursday, October 21, 2004


I don't remember her name, but I remember she was a red-headed druid.

It was the first time I ever played Dungeons & Dragons, and I had no idea what I was doing. I didn't understand what the statistics stood for, what the jargon meant, or why I needed all that funny-shaped dice.

Maybe it was my 10 years of Catholic school, but I was also pretty uncomfortable about playing. A child of the '80s, I still remembered the pamphlets about how D&D players were satanic.

But I was also the kind of kid who read J.R.R. Tolkien's Silmarillion before the age of 12. I would play "Star Wars" and act out parts from the movies with my friends - even if I whined about being forced to be Princess Leia.

To this day, I still don't consider "You're the only girl" to be a valid reason for anything.

When my then-boyfriend mentioned playing Dungeons & Dragons, I was hesitant to agree. But I was already playing "Daggerfall," a computer role playing game, and my boyfriend had just sucked me into a "Magic: The Gathering" obsession, so tabletop role-playing games were probably the next logical step.

I don't know what I expected from that first night of gaming - sacrificial knives, creepy robes, chanting - but I never thought I would still be doing it six years later.

In hindsight, my redhead wasn't a very good character. For one, everyone else already knew what character class they wanted to play. Because I was new to the game, it was "suggested" I play a character with healing spells so the group would have a healer.

For another, it took me a really long time to learn how to fight. It was months before I could remember which spells did and did not affect my armor class, the statistic that determined how hard it was to hit my character.

But I still remember that first game night. It was when we introduced "the God factor" - the term for when the cat bats your dice around after you roll it.

Until my job called me away on Sundays, I gamed with a group of friends every week. Two of them were at that very first gaming session of mine. It's no accident that they are probably my oldest friends.

While the stereotype of D&D players is not flattering, to say the least, I've always found it to be more of a social activity. I've had conversations about everything from episodes of "South Park" to "Shark Week" to the downfall of WorldCom over dice and character sheets.

Dungeons & Dragons celebrated its 30th anniversary on Saturday. According to a CNN article, 4 million people play D&D regularly.

I remember when gaming was a "weird" thing - something only the geeky kids did. But thanks to the mainstream success of fantasy-genre things such as "The Lord of the Rings" movies and the Final Fantasy video games, the geeky stuff in life is actually pretty popular.

I may still get made fun of, but at least I know I have a lot of company - with more on the way.

Now that D&D is 30 years old, the people who've played it all their lives will be able to pass it on to their kids.

I know someone who's been playing D&D since he was a 7-year-old. He has a whole binder full of character sheets from his childhood, and stories about the friends he gamed with.

He introduced me to gaming when we were dating. We're now married, as are some of our other gaming friends. One couple already has a child, and I can't imagine him growing up without throwing around some dice here and there.

Back in the day when I was still a senior in high school and was going on college visits I saw a D&D convention sort of thingie going on at one of the campuses I visited. All these weird people dressed up in robes and stuff, they had tents set up on the quad like area and I guess they were playing D&D but who knows for sure...I almost died. :o

Needless to say I did not end up going to that school and I am happy to report that in my last four years here at Mizzou I have never seen a D&D convention. :D

http://www.sourdust.com/personal/med...monergeeks.exe

It's an .exe file that opens up a video, but it's frickin hilarious.

"Roll the dice to see if I'm getting drunk. Are there any girls there? Okay, but if there's any girls there, I wanna do them!"

I'm so glad that wasn't me! ;)

My first serious boyfriend was into D&D and wanted me to play with him. So, we played, along with his roommate while they "taught" me how. Within the first week or so, my character was killed. I was really ticked off. I thought this was a learning situation, not a "let's kill her character" situation! I never played again. I'm glad I didn't stay with THAT dude!

Dee

Haha, my first serious boyfriend was also into D&D (as well as Magic and some other weird/dorky things). I never played D&D with him though. However, I am glad that I didn't stay with him. :p

Where do you guys even meet people who play D&D? Everyone talks about it likes it's really common or something but I have NEVER met a dude in college who played/plays D&D...

Then again I'm definitely not looking for one so this whole question is pretty pointless...:D ;)

don't lie...you know you're looking for one! ;)

Yeah, I remember that too. It's called "now."

bwahahahahaha

INDEED