Young generations
 

Soror Kimmie1913'a post made me think of something.

As you may (or may not) know, this is Grandparent's Week. All the week on a local radio station in Atlanta, the morning DJ's guests will all be grandparents. Today's guest was an insurance agent who gave some really good advice regarding car insurance. TOMORROW'S guests will be TWO (2) TWENTY-EIGHT YEAR OLD GRANDMOTHERS. Now, last week when they were going the promo for they show, they said they were looking for the youngest grandmothers in Atlanta. In a moment of naiveté, I didn't think they would find any under 30. Today, I learned otherwise.

My question/point of discussion is, how do we, as leaders in our own communities go about preventing more 28 year old grannies AND supporting those who already are?

Talking about Grandparent's week, I started a program on my campus called Adopt-A-Grandparent. Feel free to check out the website. http://famuadoptagrandindex.homestead.com/Index1.html

Going back to the subject at hand. That's really sad that these women are grandmothers at 28. I would be too ashamed to tell anyone that, let alone go on the radio. That's just plain ignorant and I do not feel sorry for them either. This is getting ridiculous. They are starting a cycle that will be hard to break. What if these same women are great-grandmothers by 42, that's crazy!

when our ancestors were brought from africa, they had some some base religion, a spiritual foundation. it was that foundation that got them through the hard times they had to endure. somewhere through the years, some our people have got away from our religious footing. so many of us are lacking in spiritual guidance, that is why we have 28 year-old grannies (which is like http://www.plauder-smilies.de/eek2.gif ). i think if spirituality got back into the minds/hearts/souls of our people, this type of thing wouldn't happen.

but, since it is happening and you asked how to support them, i think we need to let them know that their life isn't over and that they have still have doors open to them. because, and i know i have no statistics to back this up, but these 28 year old grandparents are probably high school drop-outs or people who have never gone to college. these people need to know that they still can do things with their lives, outside of being a mother and grandmother.

Okay, could somebody help me please? I'm over trying to figure out how you can be a 28 year old grandma--and proud of it! why, why, why???

It just doesn't make any sense to me. And how old will they be when they become great-grands?

As far as young grandparents go, I think I may have all yall beat with this story.

My now ex-stepfather married my mother when she was 38 years old. At that time, my sister was 19, and my niece was 3, thus making my stepfather a step-grandfather as well.

The step-grandfather's age was *drum roll please*....20 YEARS OLD!!!!

OK, granted, it ain't the same as being a biological grandfather, but the situation still awe's me to this day, even though this all happened 20 years ago.

Let's see 28 year old has a child by aget 14 or 15, and that young child has a baby when their 13 or 14. It can happen, it's been happing for years. When I was in high school, around 10th grade this boy that was 16 had one year old boy and his mother was 14 when she had him. Then there was a girl who was in the same grade as my neighbor she got pregnant at 13. So it's not all that unusual, but why shouldn't people try to take pride and make a bad situation possibly good. Maybe by stating that they are 28 year old grandparents, will help some women or child think about that children are having sex and a way to prevent it.

Dang this is really sad. I am 24 and I don't have any children I could not even image being a grandmother in the next 4 yrs.

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"To whom much is given, much is required."

EDUCATION, EDUCATION, AND MORE EDUCATION!!!
That is the key. May of my clients (mostly teen-aged African-American girls) are really and truly IGNORANT to the facts about their bodies, sex, reproduction. It's a shame. There are teen-agers out there (more than we even realize) who have self-esteems that are (forget about LOW) down in the gutters. There are parents out there who do not teach these children what they need to know about LIFE because the PARENTS don't know themselves. Many of my clients are SURPRISED at the information that I give them concerning these matters. As a matter of fact, one of my 16-year-old clients did not know the symptoms of AIDS or the long-term complications of the disease. And I often hear these girls say that they don't want to get on birth control because they don't want to get FAT. I say that is shameful given the fact that we live in the most advanced nation in the world. Many of these parents are so caught up in their own issues that they don't have time to cater to the needs of their children. Most of my clients have more respect for me than they have for their own parents.

I feel that it's my duty as a counselor to help them as much as possible. From then on, it's up to them (along with their parents) to make changes. And we need to realize that no matter how we look at it these people really and truly need JESUS in order to break many of the cycles in their families!!!

I always tell my clients that their situation and environment does not have to make them. Just because you were raised in the projects does not mean that you have to quit school, steal, do drugs, or have 50/11 babies. I also tell them that education is the key and I don't mean just finishing high school and going to college. But I also mean reading the news paper, talking to someone with a different background, looking and listening to the news, reading a book, volunteering.

These days the children are angry and confused. And as a result they are very, very impulsive and defiant. If we don't do all that we can to help them--continue to plant POSITIVE seeds, then we're going to be seeing grandparents even younger than that.

No, these young grandparents should not be holding their heads down but how can they hold them up when they failed to prevent their children from making the same immature mistake? As stated in an earlier post, these young grandparents are probably (I have no stats to back me up!) less educated and lower income. How is having 3 generations dependent on society something to be proud about? How many of these young grandparents are in college or encouraging their teenagers to go as well? I don't see anything to be proud about!



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MCCOYRED
Mu Psi '86
BaltCo Alumnae

Dynamic...Salient...Temperate...Since 1913

by instilling a sense of purpose, dignity, and self-respect in young women...giving them something constructive, meaningful, creative, and fun to do with their time...validating their presence instead of undermining the importance of their self-development and contribution to society from a young age...not side step informative discussions about sex because you as a parent are uncomfortable talking about it...because in the end...it is alot less uncomfortable to talk about it from an early age than be up at night taking care of your grandchild at 30...when your child is only 15...also those not in that position need to empathize with those in that position...not be so high and mighty just because it happened not to happen to you or your daughter...and work within the reality to eradicate the problem instead of simply talking about the reality and exacerbating the problem...

http://www.angelfire.com/ny5/celesti...71_2_imani.gif



[This message has been edited by celestial_blues (edited July 29, 2001).]

I'm 25 and I feel I need AT LEAST another 3-5 years before I'm ready for marriage, much less parenthood! I wouldn't know what to do with a child at my age.



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Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc.
Pi Kappa, SP97
#3 of QUINTESSENCE

Not everyone can afford to go to college, believe me, I'm and only child, single parent home and we're struggling, and the cost is rising every year. But really what I was trying to say is that no matter how bad the situation,people should try to make it positive, because dwelling on the negative gets you no where. Sometimes people are so scared that their children will make the same
mistakes that they do so the don't talk to them about how not to make the same mistakes. So I was saying that by them speaking out that they are 28 year old grandmothers, that maybe someone will listen to their story, and decide to educate their children about sex so that the won't end up in the same situation.

I just got our chapter newsletter. We are adopting a family.

The mother is 25.
Her oldest daughter is 13 and expecting a baby in April. :(

So the mom will be a 25/26 year old grandmother. The mother was 12 when she became a mom. The cycle continues. :(

:(