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Christal 10-05-2004 04:15 PM

Question for Greeks
 
I just want some people's persepctives and advice.
I have the opp. to rush a sorority. I have wanted to before but i had to transfer schools so i didn't and i have a few concerns.
I am in a really serious realationship and am afraid if i do join it will ruin it mainly b/c of time constraints. I also have a part time job and school so i am always busy, I love spending time with him(sorry for the sappeness) but he is one of my best friends and i am really worried that something could ruin it. I would like your opinion on it.
also i have seen alot of people change after they rush. whats your view on that. i know there are the typical sterotypes, which none i really fit, but i still like the idea. have you guys seen your relationships with others change?
ok thats all i have. i appriciate your time :)

winneythepooh7 10-05-2004 05:23 PM

My opinion is that the new member period is a really small amount of time to "give up" for a lifetime of sisterhood. If things are meant to be with your boy, he will be supportive of you in your decision. Only you can decide what is right for you though.

winneythepooh7 10-05-2004 05:25 PM

Oh yeah, as for people "changing" people change everyday. The sorority is often a positive influence on many people.

KSUViolet06 10-05-2004 05:50 PM

Re: Question for Greeks
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Christal

also i have seen alot of people change after they rush. whats your view on that. i know there are the typical sterotypes, which none i really fit, but i still like the idea. have you guys seen your relationships with others change?

As far as people changing, joining a sorority only changed me for the better. I am more organized. I do more for my community and I'm more involved on campus.

Those who change negatively (become stuck up/shut non-greek friends out) do so by choice. They are DEFINED by their letters. YOU make the sorority. The sorority should NEVER make or define you.

Your boyfriend should support anything you choose to do that is going to benefit you in a positive way. Your relationship shouldn't be "ruined" b/c you want to expand your horizons. Lifetime sisterhood is (in my opinion) worth missing a couple dinner dates, etc. with the boyfriend. He theoretically should understand your desire to have a close group of girl friends.
You again have to do what you feel is best for you
:)

Optimist Prime 10-05-2004 06:01 PM

If you're boyfriend dumps you because you pledge you should have dumped him. Plus then you can date a frat boy and frat boy's are better. If he is as serious about the relationship as you are he will understand. If not he's a loser and you can date a frat boy. I already said that though. Good luck.

LatinaAlumna 10-05-2004 06:05 PM

A good boyfriend will not only support your decision to expand your horizons, but might even help your sorority out! Most of our boyfriends (some in GLOs, some not) really pitched in to help our chapter with fundraisers, community service, advertising, etc. It was great to have that kind of support.

Side note: almost all of these boyfriends later became husbands! ;)

Kevin 10-05-2004 06:20 PM

Part of having a successful relationship in the long-term is being able to have your own seperate outside interests. Talk to him about this. He may not be mature enough to handle this, but really, 20 years from now, do y'all want a relationship where you have nothing to do but be with eachother? As fun as that sounds now, later on, you'll realize that outside activities are important!

PhoenixAzul 10-05-2004 07:52 PM

I pledged last year, and I actually recieved my bid on our two year anniversary! But at any rate...he was really against my joining, but in the end he realized how much it meant to me. He came to our formal and has met all of our sisters, and he thinks that it was something good for ME. It was another home for me while I was miles away from home (I go to school out of state). Pledging is time consuming, but so are relationships...you'll have to find the balance. I think that finding meaningful relationships with women is worth the time.

Wine&SilverBlue 10-05-2004 08:35 PM

I have been dating my boyfriend for a little over 2 years, and I pledged while dating him. He is a starter on the bball team and the only one of his home games that I missed was on bid day.

He has been 100% supportive of me, although he does tease me from time to time about an obsession with "piphi!!" (which he'll say in a highpitched silly voice).

I was very busy last semester between pledging and training for a peer counseling organization (10-6 every sat, 7-10 every tues night, all semester) but he understood what it means to have a commitment like that since he spends so much time on basketball.

He nags me from time to time about sorority secrets but so far I haven't budged ;)

He didn't even mind when I took a guy friend to Monmouth Duo because he had an away game that weekend.

If he's worth your while, he will support you in this and anything else you want to do.

honeychile 10-05-2004 08:40 PM

Cosign on what everyone else has already said, but I wanted to add something.

One of the very best reasons to join a sorority (other than the obvious sisterhood reasons) is that you will learn time management skills about which most people can only dream!! You'll have a great support system to keep you on your toes in each of the areas that concern you.

Good luck, and have fun!

Tom Earp 10-05-2004 10:40 PM

Interesting question!

If a boy friend wont support you for what you want to do with your life, then what does He want to do with Your Life?

If you are a Freshman, then you both are to young to decide what is right for both of you. Love is Grand. It is a proven fact that there are 10,000 partnerships of possibility out there.

Joining a GLO (Greek Letter Organization) is something that expands your life, friendship, and knowledge along with if and when you become an Officer How to operate an Officership of a Major Operating Company. Oh Yes, a Sorority/Fraternity is a Business and should be run as such.

OKAY, I have been doing this for 40 years and I can call a Brother when I have a problem, no matter what!

That in a nut shell is what you can get from a GLO! Life long friendships that continue 40 Years later!:)


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