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-   -   Break Up Advice (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=55871)

adpiucf 08-24-2004 08:23 PM

Break Up Advice
 
Any advice on how to break up with someone? I'm not getting into specifics, but this guy I was dating for a few months has turned out to be both disrespectful and distant, and I don't want to be treated that way, so I'd like to end it. And I'd like to communicate that his behavior was not cool.

smiley21 08-24-2004 08:27 PM

i have been in your situation. the best thing i ever did in that relationship was tell him that it was over. i was straight with him. tell him exactly how you feel. there is nothing more freeing about breaking up than saying exactly how you feel and ending the relationship. if you are not straight with him, than you could be going down a road that you don't want to travel. it could drag the relationship on for an unnecessary about of time.
there is no advice better than honest communication. you do not deserve to be treated disrespectfully. show that man no mercy!!!;)

Imperial1 08-24-2004 08:55 PM

I just stop calling and don't return their calls. They should be able to get the message by then.

Imperial1

KSig RC 08-24-2004 09:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Imperial1
I just stop calling and don't return their calls. They should be able to get the message by then.

Imperial1


'they'? 'their'? something you want to talk about, dear?




for the OP - sounds like you strongly dislike the dude, so channel that into the discussion, but tell the truth, and don't get vindictive or you're as bad as he is. Make it clear that he's being a douche, and that's why you're out.

winneythepooh7 08-24-2004 09:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Imperial1
I just stop calling and don't return their calls. They should be able to get the message by then.

Imperial1

While this is a good method for some, I think it is better to just come right out and say it. Otherwise some people just don't get it and will keep harassing you thinking they stand a chance. After you've expressed that it is over then do what Imperial says.

James 08-24-2004 09:38 PM

Re: Break Up Advice
 
There is no good way to break up with someone. There is no good reason you can give them either. So don't explain. Explaining is mean.

A good way might be meeting (both driving) at a restaurant, making small talk and then breaking up AFTER the checks is paid. And try to be cavalier about it. Keep your tone kind of upbeat. And then leave and go home and observe the no-contact rule.


Quote:

Originally posted by adpiucf
Any advice on how to break up with someone? I'm not getting into specifics, but this guy I was dating for a few months has turned out to be both disrespectful and distant, and I don't want to be treated that way, so I'd like to end it. And I'd like to communicate that his behavior was not cool.

damasa 08-24-2004 11:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by KSig RC

for the OP - sounds like you strongly dislike the dude, so channel that into the discussion, but tell the truth, and don't get vindictive or you're as bad as he is. Make it clear that he's being a douche, and that's why you're out.

The only other advice I give is to follow this with a precision neckchop.

Seriously, sit his ass down and tell him how it is...

AchtungBaby80 08-24-2004 11:55 PM

Whatever you do, don't draaaaaaag it out. It's better to have just one emotional Big Breakup Scene than several, plus, he can't say you acted like an ass about it. Just be up front and direct. I'm really bad at this, so I know from experience you don't want to get caught up in "letting him down gently" because that usually leads to mixed signals and weirdness.

BabyP 08-25-2004 05:18 AM

meet somewhere in public -dont let it be longer than 20 minutes and leave........try to be the first one to walk away....... just tell him its OVER............. not working for you. bye.....sometimes its bad to explain cuz the guy is trying to say I will change my ways or it can go ugly and he will point fingers at you.

Imperial1 08-25-2004 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KSig RC
'they'? 'their'? something you want to talk about, dear?




for the OP - sounds like you strongly dislike the dude, so channel that into the discussion, but tell the truth, and don't get vindictive or you're as bad as he is. Make it clear that he's being a douche, and that's why you're out.

Damn you slow! smh

Imperial1

Imperial1 08-25-2004 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by winneythepooh7
While this is a good method for some, I think it is better to just come right out and say it. Otherwise some people just don't get it and will keep harassing you thinking they stand a chance. After you've expressed that it is over then do what Imperial says.
I wish his ass would harrass me. He'll get a pack of cuss words and a click-dial tone afterwards. lol

Imperial1

Lady Pi Phi 08-25-2004 11:55 AM

Just tell him like it is. Especially since you say he is being disrespectful.
Tell him you don't like his behaviour and are unhappy and that you are ending the relationship.

cashmoney 08-25-2004 01:21 PM

Re: Break Up Advice
 
Quote:

Originally posted by adpiucf
Any advice on how to break up with someone? I'm not getting into specifics, but this guy I was dating for a few months has turned out to be both disrespectful and distant, and I don't want to be treated that way, so I'd like to end it. And I'd like to communicate that his behavior was not cool.


There are two routes: 1.) Not calling/Not seeing again and 2.) Call him up and tell him things are over and that you're sorry but things arent working out.


I chose the first method.

adpiucf 08-25-2004 01:33 PM

Re: Re: Break Up Advice
 
Quote:

Originally posted by cashmoney
There are two routes: 1.) Not calling/Not seeing again and 2.) Call him up and tell him things are over and that you're sorry but things arent working out.


I chose the first method.


Yeah, but I just want him to know that I'm aware he's a jerk. I hope he has a nice life; I just want to make a 15-second statement that it's over.

Lady Pi Phi 08-25-2004 01:45 PM

Re: Re: Re: Break Up Advice
 
Quote:

Originally posted by adpiucf
Yeah, but I just want him to know that I'm aware he's a jerk. I hope he has a nice life; I just want to make a 15-second statement that it's over.
So tell him like that...

say, "I think you're a jerk and it's over. Have a nice life". If he doesn't get that then he's an idiot too ;)


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