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-   -   Another friend thread (kind of shady though) (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=55570)

Dionysus 08-18-2004 01:00 PM

Another friend thread (kind of shady though)
 
How can you turn a group against one person? lol

I do know how to do this in a few ways, but with this person, I think my techniques will backfire. Share some of yours. It has to be SUBTLE SUBTLE SUBTLE!

:D

Lil' Hannah 08-18-2004 01:07 PM

Well, there's always the "stop calling/hanging out/speaking method" which I think is pretty uncool but sometimes if the person didn't do anything that warrants a snubbing but you still want to snub, this is the only way to go.

You could always set up an elaborate plan where you lure the person into cheating with someone's boyfriend, stealing, or something equally underhanded, but that may be tough to orchestrate and your friend might not fall into the trap.

ETA: Either I didn't read the subtle part or you edited it after I hit "reply." Elaborate plans are obviously not subtle, but you seem like the scheming type to me...I think you can pull this off.:p

PM_Mama00 08-18-2004 01:12 PM

Go see Mean Girls.

Kevin 08-18-2004 01:13 PM

I don't think it's necessarily honorable to scheme against folks like that. If you have a beef with someone, air it out in the open. Your real friends will side with you or try to help mediate the problem.

Scheming, etc. will nearly always backfire. You'll end up being the one everyone turns against. Karma's a bitch sometimes.

Dionysus 08-18-2004 01:25 PM

Ok, let me give some background on this.

I'm kind of like the newbie of this group, I knew them for awhile, but I just started hanging out with these people around a month ago. I can tell already that I will NOT get along with this person. She is extremely uptight and condescending. This girl thinks she's the epitome of morality (one of the reasons why she is so obnoxious), so I think it will be kind of hard to trick her into doing something shady. Of course, that can be a cover-up, but I don't want to take the chance. She does seem easily provoked though. At this point, I think direct confrontation will backfire. You guys know this from being in fraternity and sororities. What do you think of rushees who directly challenge older and respected members? That doesn't go over too well.

Kevin 08-18-2004 01:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dionysus
Ok, let me give some background on this.

I'm kind of like the newbie of this group, I knew them for awhile, but I just started hanging out with these people around a month ago. I can tell already that I will NOT get along with this person. S/he is extremely uptight and condescending. This girl thinks she's the epitome of morality (one of the reasons why she is so obnoxious), so I think it will be kind of hard to trick her into doing something shady. Of course, that can be a cover-up, but I don't want to take the chance. She does seem easily provoked though. At this point, I think direct confrontation will backfire. You guys know this from being in fraternity and sororities. What do you think of rushees who directly challenge older and respected members? That doesn't go over too well.

It always depends on the situation in my experience. I'd be concerned with doing it and not having to feel like I just manipulated the people I want to call my friends. That's dishonest and dishonorable -- and personally, I'd never go for it. If I was a person in this group, I would also be very pissed at you if you did something dishonest and dishonorable along those lines.

Just be honest. Say, I don't feel comfortable hanging out with y'all when she's around because I just can't stand that holier than thou attitude. Who knows, a few of them might just agree with you.

Lil' Hannah 08-18-2004 01:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dionysus
Ok, let me give some background on this.

I'm kind of like the newbie of this group, I knew them for awhile, but I just started hanging out with these people around a month ago. I can tell already that I will NOT get along with this person. She is extremely uptight and condescending. This girl thinks she's the epitome of morality (one of the reasons why she is so obnoxious), so I think it will be kind of hard to trick her into doing something shady. Of course, that can be a cover-up, but I don't want to take the chance. She does seem easily provoked though. At this point, I think direct confrontation will backfire. You guys know this from being in fraternity and sororities. What do you think of rushees who directly challenge older and respected members? That doesn't go over too well.

Man, you can't roll up in this group and get them to turn on one of their friends. Do they all dislike her? I mean if that's the case then I guess just stop calling her to hang out and stuff. Maybe instead of getting her to do something shady you can take advantage of her uppity-ness and get her to have a huge blow-out with someone in the group. Then the rest will take care of itself.

AXJules 08-18-2004 01:35 PM

So let me get this straight-
You met Circle Cool. Circle Cool accepts you, and you decide you do not like present composition of Circle Cool and are going to weed out those not priveleged enough to hang out with you?

I LOVE IT. :D

Sister Havana 08-18-2004 01:45 PM

Here you go:

-If the person in question does something little that annoys you...well, there is no such thing as a little thing. Everything is a CAPITAL OFFENSE.

-If they do something to someone else that you are offended by, even if the other person isn't bothered, convince that person that he or she SHOULD be greatly offended by that person's actions.

-There is no good reason for someone doing something you don't approve of. It's all excuses or spin.

-Was there a misunderstanding? When that person tries to clear it up, tell them that it just proves that they think you're upset by specific EVENTS and not their evil TENDENCIES.

-But if they just talk about things in general, trying to clear stuff up, accuse them of ducking the specific EVENTS you are concerned about.

-Did you have a problem in the past that you worked out? No, you didn't! Nothing's ever cleared up! Feel free to bring up anything bad they did in the past over and over and OVER again.

-Don't forget to write about them in your Livejournal so the whole world can see what a HORRIBLE PERSON you know and how you are such a SAINT to put up with said person.

Trust me. This works.

cuaphi 08-18-2004 01:47 PM

Seems like all you have to do is work your way to a leadership role within this group or at least make them think you are extremely cool then start slowly building a case against uptight girl. First you start pointed out her faults behind her back, then you start finding weaknesses or hypocrisy in what she says and singling her out publicly, then you get everyone full on gossiping about her, then you start excluding her. This is all assuming she's weak enough to be taken down. If she's gonna put up a fight you're in trouble.

Is that about right or should I go watch Mean Girls a few more times? Girls are evil. I wish we could be more like men and just fight it out sometimes.

Lil' Hannah 08-18-2004 01:53 PM

It's imperative that you have established some sort of leadership in this group. You don't want to start badmouthing the friend and then they'll be like "OMGWTFBBQ who does Dionysus think she is coming in here and talking crap about mu_agd" or they may question what you're saying behind their backs and you don't want that either. If you're not quite there with the group yet, you need to get the leader on your side and she will slowly be able to turn the group.

Kevin 08-18-2004 01:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cuaphi
Is that about right or should I go watch Mean Girls a few more times? Girls are evil. I wish we could be more like men and just fight it out sometimes.
I can see I have no power and influence in this thread :D

I was just about to suggest that you just throw down and be openly hostile. I guess that doesn't work in that world ;)

33girl 08-18-2004 01:56 PM

If you are known as someone who pretty much gets along with everyone, the fact that you don't like this one person - even if it isn't said outright and there's just an unspoken tension between the two of you - will stick out like a sore thumb and probably cause others to think twice about that person.

But if you're known as a moody bia who backstabs as often as she breathes and hates life and everyone in it, sorry, you're going to have to suck it up or get new friends. :p

Lil' Hannah 08-18-2004 03:33 PM

So, did you get rid of her yet or what? :p

Dionysus 08-18-2004 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 33girl
If you are known as someone who pretty much gets along with everyone, the fact that you don't like this one person - even if it isn't said outright and there's just an unspoken tension between the two of you - will stick out like a sore thumb and probably cause others to think twice about that person.

But if you're known as a moody bia who backstabs as often as she breathes and hates life and everyone in it, sorry, you're going to have to suck it up or get new friends. :p

I'm known as the quiet girl. :D

But, seriously, I don't show my Dionysian ways until I get to know people really well...and if they put up with it.


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