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Not getting the pledge son who is best for you...
Okay, so tommorow is our formal pledge night and the pledges find out who there pledge fathers (big brother) are.
Well we found out who our sons are, and I've got the guy I would have picked toward the end of the entire pledge class in order of preference...In fact when we were debating on whether or not we should sign this guy or not, I actually was a major voice AGAINST giving him a bid card, (check out my discussion of this here ). Since then I think he's deserved a place here, and I've been pretty impressed by him. But I really don't share any interests with the guy and I dont' think that I could possible be the best active to be his pledge dad. But our pledge ed is in charge of the final selections and he is set making sure that all the sophomore pledges have juniors for pledge fathers. I think the biggest dissappointment is in that my pledge son last year (who was unfortunately depledged) was awesome and was a great friend. And I know it's not going to be the same type of relationship... So does any one have any stories about getting littles or pledge sons/daughters that they didn't think would work out but it ended up being really good? |
I was basically in the same position as you last year at this time... I had taken a little in the spring, a good friend named Kathleen. Kathleen and I have SO much in common - we're both theatre majors, know the same people, hung out before she pledged Kappa, have the same morals, come from similar families, and got along wonderfully. We like doing the same things. We were a great big/little pair, and I LOVED having her at Kappa. Unfortunately, just before Initiation her family had some money issues, and she was not able to be initiated. I was heartbroken. I had been SO excited about her Initiation, was so looking forward to truely calling her my sister - and now I didn't get to.
So when the fall rolled around, I was excited about getting another little, but there was a bitterness to it as well - I didn't think I could ever get a little as special as Kathleen. I didn't really click with any of the New Members, and so when we had to list the three girls we wanted as littles, I didn't even know who to put down - I just picked three who seemed nice. And then our New Member Ed came to me, and told me that Tracy had listed me as first choice for her big sister, but she hadn't been on my list. I barely knew Tracy - we had maybe one conversation prior to this point. I'm fairly conservative, and Tracy is a wild child. She drinks a lot, parties a lot, dates 10 boys at once - I'm exaggerating a little, but not much! We had NOTHING in common. I had to think long and hard before agreeing to take her as a little - and then everyone in the sorority came up to me at least three times and said "Wow, you guys have nothing in common... how's that gonna work?" However, it somehow did work. Tracy and I ended up complimenting each other wonderfully - we balance each other out. We found that we did have things in common, and while we didn't seem to make sense at first (and we had some awkward times when we didn't know each other so well), we ended up being one of the strongest big/little pairs. I even dragged her out to work at camp with me this summer, which is something that she NEVER would have done before joining Kappa - living for two months in the woods without electricity or flushing toilets! :) To add a happy ending to my (long!) story, Kathleen was able to come back to Kappa last fall, so I suddenly had two little sisters in the same semster - my TWINS! And Kathleen and Tracy get along wonderfully, and now that I'm alum they kinda have each other to lean on - and their Initiation was my favorite Kappa memory - being able to bring two beautiful, amazing, classy young women into the organization I love so dearly! So I think you should take this guy as your little - it might work out way better than you had hoped. |
In my chapter, the pledges were asked to list three people they wanted for a big bro, and actives were always asked if there was anyone in particular they wanted. Well, my big and I didn't pick each other, and our Inductor (Pledge Ed) decided to put the two of us together precisely because we were opposite personality types and he and some of the other brothers thought we might "cancel" each other out! He was always really wild and a little hyperactive, where I was a bit on the reserved/shy side (that has changed!).
Anyway, it turned out to be a good match despite the fact we had little in common. Here we are sixteen years later, and we still get together and do things occasionally (he lives about 2 1/2 hours from me). |
My pledge class was small (seven girls) and the sisters we were exposed to before big/little sis matching were few.
I didn't list Erica on my big sis preference sheet, and I have always suspected she didn't pick me. Erica was a dance major (she since graduated), I'm pre-med; Erica's understated and classy and I can be outspoken and overwhelming. It was a great match. I realized later I wouldn't have matched well with my first two choices -- and I don't even remember my third, which tells you how well I got to know her later. Give the guy a chance... give him every opportunity to show you what kind of little brother he can be. Erica did -- she didn't doubt me from the start, even when I questioned my badge during my pledge period. I must have been the most difficult little sis ever, but almost 2 years later I can't think of anyone else who's been more influential in my Phi Mu life. |
Come on Betarulz,
You can give a lot to give a newbie, and you can also learn something from him!:) Hell you dont want a genetic alike do you? Stop and think for a minute, I never had a Pledge Little. I was the Big for all of the Local Brothers, does that count!:confused: |
Our matchings were randomly done (as far as I know)---- the girl I was assigned as my little was named Sandee, we barely knew each other and barely spoke. I had a little indirect history with the girl. My husband and I are high school sweethearts although after dating several years we broke up. While apart he dated Sandee. They saw each other casually for a couple of months, until Shawn and I got back together.
We were both convinced that one of us hated the other. We got to know each other and figured out there was no hate. My concern came from I had no clue how my now husband felt about her, what he said about me, etc. Sandee just thought I would hate her since she dated him. We learned alot about each other--got along great-- I found out that she knew everything about me and hated seeing him, as all he talked about was me. When I announced our engagment she was one of the first to congratulate me. Good luck!! wendi |
Wendi, when we going to do a KC Gatehring???
Betarulz, if OTW comes to Neb for Football game and I cannot stay at LXA house will you guys give me a couch!:confused: :D |
Wendi, just a thought -- that sounds like the best possible way you two girls could have smoothed things over!
I doubt it was a coencidence..... but then I don't believe in coencidences. |
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Sure thing Tom...I've got a futon here we can get set up for a night :D |
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Da Ya Moron, More GCers in KC than Lawerence:)
We need a KC AREA Gathering!!!!!!! Betarulz, I may take you up on that offer. That Would Drive the Betas Nuts and the LX also! What is the date on the Game?? Even if dont go to the Game, can still party Bro!:cool: |
Beta, I had a similar experience with my ex-little bro. He had nothing in common with really anyone in the house. I have no idea how I ended up with him. He was a complete flake and I ended up being one of many that dropped a ball on him. Turns out he had just pledged Sigma Nu because his girlfriend/fiancee was an Alpha Xi Delta -- she had told him to. As I said, complete flake. Since then, he's dropped out of school and gone to work for the Democratic Party. Last I heard he was working on the Howard Dean campaign. Hope your experience isn't as bad as mine was.
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I really dont mind where... chances are it would be hard for me to make it right now anyway cuz I'm planning philanthropy!!
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How about I wait a week and then put up a GC KC area Meeting up. Get some ideas and go for there?
Sat. Sun. Got to be a place where non 21 can get into. Still like the idea for The Woodlands Race Track. Large enuff for a group, eating drinking and gambling if all are up for it? Is easy access to the Interstates. :) |
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