English 101
 

Sorry for the email forward thingies, but this was too funny not to share. :D

This illustrates over and over again, how misleading our language is!


> > > > We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;
> > > > but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.
> > > > One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
> > > > yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
> > > > You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
> > > > yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
> > > >
> > > > If the plural of man is always called men,
> > > > why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
> > > > If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
> > > > and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
> > > > If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
> > > > why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
> > > >
> > > > Then one may be that, and three would be those,
> > > > yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
> > > > and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
> > > > We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
> > > > but though we say mother, we never say methren.
> > > >
> > > > Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
> > > > but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.
> > > >
> > > > Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There
> > > > is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
> > > > neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
> > > >
> > > > We take English for granted.
> > > >
> > > > But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that
> > > > quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square
> and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
> > > >
> > > > Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking
> > > > English should be committed to an asylum for the
> > > > verbally insane.
> > > >
> > > > In what other language do people recite at a play and
> > > > play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
> > > > Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a
> > > > slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
> > > > while a wise man and a wiseguy are opposites?
> > > >
> > > > You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a
> > > > language in which your house can burn up as it burns down,
> > > > in which you fill in a form by filling it out
> > > > and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

haha, funny stuff. so true.
[thank you, i needed to take a break from work]

Hilarious!

This is funny. :D

Funny stuff, Sheila! :)

When I was in HS, I had a hard time learning a foreign language.

My French teacher used to say, "Sandy...how are you supposed to learn French when you struggle with English?"

I think I'm going to cut and paste the above passage and send it to Madame.

Hahaha this is so great! I'm from Russia and when I had to learn English this was all sooo true! It's great!:cool: