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bgsugirlie 05-12-2003 12:17 AM

Retention
 
How do you make sisters want to stay in chapter?

Lately, we've been having problems with some of our girls saying that sorority isn't the same as when they joined, they don't feel appreciated, we lost our sisterhood, etc. and they want to quit.

What do we do to stop that?

GeekyPenguin 05-12-2003 12:20 AM

Re: Retention
 
Quote:

Originally posted by bgsugirlie
How do you make sisters want to stay in chapter?

Lately, we've been having problems with some of our girls saying that sorority isn't the same as when they joined, they don't feel appreciated, we lost our sisterhood, etc. and they want to quit.

What do we do to stop that?

Wish I had more ideas - my chapter is in a similar situation! Do a lot of sisterhood building - not a mandatory activity, but "Monday night is movie night, Tuesday night is Study night, etc..." so that the girls know there is always an XYZ activity of some sort every night of the week. If you do a search for "sisterhood activity" you'll get a lot of great ideas, we've used them in my chapter and it has helped. :)

dutchgirl 05-12-2003 05:14 AM

It might be nice to 'drop by' the sisters dorm rooms/houses, just to have a chat every once in a while. I agree with GeekyPenguin that it is important to let people know that there are opportunities to hang out together. Just watch television together, have a pizza or play some games (like risk or monopoly), talk about books you've read recently, have coffee together, give a sister a call to go shopping, : I think it's all about 'hanging out', spontaneously or planned!

Good luck with your sisterhood!

Dutchgirl

astroAPhi 05-12-2003 09:26 AM

I'd suggest a Retreat or a Chapter Forum. In our last chapter forum, we split up in 4 groups and discussed problems related to retention, spirit, involvement, etc. We then sat down and POSTIVELY discussed possible solutions. As someone who has been in your sisters' shoes, this gives them a good chance to air out some problems without seeming or feeling like a total *****.

I can say that if we had had that Chapter Forum a week later, I wouldn't still be a sister. :(

AXEgirl 05-12-2003 01:12 PM

This is something that me and my friends do...

Waiting to Exhale Night

We all get together at someone's house, preferably someone with an apartment (or do this in your sorority house). Generally, this is a sleep-over event. Everyone pitch in for food. Then just play games (Taboo, Guesstures, etc), eat, talk.

We started doing poetry slams at our last ones, and giving everyone journals to keep.

It helps keep us together in a group and lets everyone get out whatever is on their chest.

Hope this helps!

texas*princess 05-12-2003 01:24 PM

Birthday parties!!!
 
One thing you could do is celebrate the birthday's in your chapter once a month.

For example you can have the chapter celebrate all the January Birthday's with a slumber party in January, complete with cake, movies, and stuff for manicures & other girly stuff like that :) And if you do the same for all the birthday's in the chapter, everyone gets a birthday party :)

PM_Mama00 05-12-2003 01:43 PM

We've had this problem so many times. As an older member (I've been active for 3 years) I, too, feel that my chapter isn't the same as when I joined. That can be good, and bad. Possibly explain to these girls that things change and people change. If there are big problems in the sorority, have a fireside. Everyone sits in a circle, and the only person allowed to talk is the girl with a candle (or whatever you'd like to use). Each person brings up a problem that they have encountered (but nothing about one on one problems with sisters). Sometimes people talk about something goin on in their personal life at home, a problem with the sorority, or if someone doesn't have a problem they can either just pass the candle or say something positive.

What we've started this past semester is a Carnation Passing. We have a carnation, and it's basically the same as a fireside but EVERYTHING is positive. We've had things said from "I love my sisters..."blah blah blah, to even things like "happy Black History month", to "I like ice cream". It can get happy tearful, or just downright hilarious. This always puts the girls in a good mood before leaving a meeting... and we do it every meeting.

Other things are just have fun sisterhood events. Don't make it mandatory, but make it fun enough that everyone will show up. Go sing karaoke, or have a game nite, or even have a "Friends" night which is very popular with us. We just sit around and watch Friends and eat.

Optimist Prime 05-12-2003 05:25 PM

Email list, so they know whats up. Maybe your secritary could be in charge, or some one. But it should be that person's job to handle all correspondance, instead of everyone always emailing just whenever. But don't limit jokes, etc from other sisters. If this is something you are worried about you're probably not the only one. Bring it up at chapter, or talk to a few girls you're close with. Then if you're a smaller chapter, get the whole group together. If you're chapter is huge then start calling/iming/emailing sisters randomly to come hang out. NOt always the same people. If you can get all this organized you should run for an office, if you're not already one. :) Good luck.

Optimist Prime 05-12-2003 05:27 PM

I just reread your original post (sorry I got side tracked in my previous response). You should remind them that the ritual is for life, that the bonds you share are for life. Tell them if they don't like the direction the chapter is going in then to be leaders and stand up and say so and work to bring it back going in the right direction. If you need help in how to do this, then PM me. It sucks that they feel unapreciated but GLOs aren't something you quit. Especailly the chapter were you were iniatiated.

adpiucf 04-05-2004 03:40 AM

bump

Tom Earp 04-05-2004 04:13 PM

?????????/ why dont They Want To Stay In The Chapter???

Not wanted, have to much to do, there is no Sisterhood, Gatherings(Partys), have responibilities, or to lazy?

Why am I answering this post???:confused:

adpiucf 04-05-2004 04:20 PM

'cuz you're bored, Tom. :)

I think the reason retention is down across the board is that we don't haze them into staying... what do you all think?

Breathe.... Breathe. I'm kidding!!!!

Well, there could be a factor of truth to that idea.... In the "olden" days of sorority, there was a lot more weighed on "proving yourself" as a "pledge." The idea behind that being that initiation was a great reward and you were given the privilege to be a sister. Our current member discipline, however, brings new members in with the notion that the pre-initiation period is a time for arts and crafts and preparing for a test.

I am in no way condoning hazing or hazing traditions.

I wonder, without the hazing, what we could learn from the sisters who went before us, that would inspire our members to stay active for all 4 years? Or is it really that society has shifted such that we've altogether lost our uselfulness as a "home away from home" for collegiate women?

How do we make our sororities a home for FOUR years, and prevent members from burning out, dropping out or dissenting so that they take other chapter members out with their negative attitude?

I'm really interested to hear input of some older alums, and members at current small, large and middle sized chapters.

Tom Earp 04-05-2004 04:28 PM

4 Years of College, that is almost unheard of!

Burn Out is a big thing, so few doing so much and the others doing so little to enjoy what is going on!

The Few get burned out and complain and then the others pick up on it!:(

Misery sometimes love company and all will complain about it, but still do nothing!:eek:

shadokat 04-05-2004 04:38 PM

I agree with Tom. Not everyone who pledges as a freshman is burned out as a senior. Yes, everyone gets burned out from time to time, including myself, but I never once thought, I'm disaffiliating because it isn't what I thought it was. BUT, when one group of these "bad apples" exist, they can often bring an entire chapter down.

Times and people change, and while older members may not see "Themselves" in the newer members, I remind them that THEY are the ones who chose to give these newer women bids, and therefore must live with the consequences. Yes, it's hard to realize, but it's the truth.

Promoting sisterhood for a lifetime, making sure your chapter members aren't overprogrammed, and making sorority fun and welcoming is what keeps members active.

If you're having trouble with dead weight members, I suggest bring them to standards board for not fulfilling sisterhood duties and let the chips fall where they may. Besides, for every "burnt out" woman in a sorority, there is often a girl who didn't get a bid at recruitment, and would happily step into that spot if the older sister didn't want it anymore.

SmartBlondeGPhB 04-05-2004 04:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by adpiucf
'cuz you're bored, Tom. :)

I think the reason retention is down across the board is that we don't haze them into staying... what do you all think?

Breathe.... Breathe. I'm kidding!!!!

Well, there could be a factor of truth to that idea.... In the "olden" days of sorority, there was a lot more weighed on "proving yourself" as a "pledge." The idea behind that being that initiation was a great reward and you were given the privilege to be a sister. Our current member discipline, however, brings new members in with the notion that the pre-initiation period is a time for arts and crafts and preparing for a test.

I am in no way condoning hazing or hazing traditions.

I wonder, without the hazing, what we could learn from the sisters who went before us, that would inspire our members to stay active for all 4 years? Or is it really that society has shifted such that we've altogether lost our uselfulness as a "home away from home" for collegiate women?

How do we make our sororities a home for FOUR years, and prevent members from burning out, dropping out or dissenting so that they take other chapter members out with their negative attitude?

I'm really interested to hear input of some older alums, and members at current small, large and middle sized chapters.

I don't think you're THAT far off. I had to work for my membership to Gamma Phi, and no not even now do I consider any of it hazing. There was nothing degrading or humiliating about anything I had to do. But I had to PROVE that I wanted to be there and that does not happen now. And no, you recent new members, you did not have to prove anything.

First off, grades. My god, how could we (or the Universities which is who lead this one) not want to make girls have a certain GPA to initiate? When you have to actually work to get something, you appreciate it a WHOLE lot more. I know from my own experience.

Then there's the short pledgeship. A number of women have no idea what the sorority is like and have absolutely no regard for the commitment they made.

Hell, we have women deactivating because they don't want to live in the house, a basic, fundamental rule.....


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