Why don't college guys ask out girls for dates anymore?
 

Hi I have a question, well me and my friends were talking about this: Why don't college guys ask out girls anymore? I mean going to the bar or meeting at a party is not a date. A date is setting up a date, time, and place. I know that it is 2003 and women could ask out guys but I would still like to be asked out for a real date not some party date.

What does everyone think about this?

If they are young college guys they probably aren't looking for dates just booty calls probably, I am sure some are shy though.

I think a big part of it is that college guys are young and want to have fun, more than most want a serious girlfriend who they feel obligated to do things for and to be a certain way for.

They can get all the booty they want without ever dating or committing (at least if they are decent-looking and friendly), so why tie yourself down to one girl?

College guys these days must be in heaven. A lot of girls will put out (at least to some extent) outside of a relationship...so why would a guy who's not looking to settle down anytime soon get himself into a committed situation?

We don't have to ask you out anymore lol.

standards o courtship have changed so much that you really don't have to treat a girl very well. At least not by older standards.

Hey. Come over. Meet me here.


Seems to be most dating in college. And having some frozen macaroni ready to cook.

I am not sure if its totally a booty call situation . . . I was just talking to a guy last night that was complaining about college girls . . .

In his situation they "hung out" and hooked-up for weeks. No actual dates. And then he wondered why she started losing interest because he actually wanted to go out with her and thought that was how to go about doing it lol.

ITs justa breakdown of social skills. Guys aren't taught to do much and you girls don't expect much.

I've got two different perspectives on this...


Why don't girls ever ask guys out on dates...The times a girl asked me out in HS and once last year (as well as a couple of formals) were the best dates I've ever been on, and even though some of the girls who asked me I wasn't necessarily interested in, I still said yes. That was mainly due to shock of being asked.


Second would you girls still hold the same levels of rejection as always? If it was one of those things that made a girl jump and scream "absolutely" guys would do it. But when I have to ask sometimes three and four different girls to a formal (even when I say it's just for fun) it just seems to me that why bother with trying to get a date.



As for other reasons: $$$ is a big one. I could either take a girl out to dinner and a movie for $30, or I can invite her to a party where I pay $5. If both were to have the same end result (either physical hook up, or nothing at all) what's the point?

What if I can create a relationship out of just taking her to parties...where's the draw in dating before that?



basically I'd say that the reason is all girls' fault. Make it worthwhile for us to do it and we will, b/c guys will do what it takes to please girls, something most girls don't seem to ever realize.

This is what I suspect. I know what it is like to be a broke college student so I wouldn't ask a guy to drop a lot of money on me for a date. I mean, we can watch a movie at the house and accomplish the same thing that going on a date would. If I really want to go out, I never mind going dutch unless the guy offers to pay first.

It's too easy
 

I have a girlfriend now so I am all tied up and shouldn't say, but when I was single it was so easy to just hook up with hot looking girls w/out dating. I'm sorry it's not that I don't have respect for women which I do but why spend more money and time if you don't have to. WHen I'm really interested in a girl I will ask her out. I mean if she has the total package, brains, looks, charm. etc. I think it's a crazy point in time for men. Women are turning into the way men are. They're the ones taking control now at days. I had talked to my best friend about that the other day. We were both like, "yeah, what ever happend to the sweet innocent girls of old." It seems like the sweet and innocent girls I meet now at days are all closet nymphos. I also hate it when women talk about men not being gentlemen enough. Probably because women killed chivalry. They want equal opportunity for everything and I can respect that, but it just seems that a lot of women don't have the respect for themselves that they used to now a day. Maybe it's me growing up in Texas I don't know.

The standard for courting in college has changed...its not like back when where a girl found someone in college to marry- now they go on after school and start their own lives. So I think the less of a focus on dating and marrying at a young age has changed it so that now college is more of a casual environment- thus guys don't ask girls out as much---yaknow

I asked a girl out on a date last week. She accepted and half way through dinner she thought it best to inform me that it wouldn’t be leading anywhere. At first I thought she meant that if I was out for sex I wouldn’t be getting any that evening but no she meant that there was no future for us. So I sucked it up played the perfect gentleman and finished out the date on a strong note. I know why I won’t be asking anyone out on a date anytime soon. So much for formal.

Some guys just don't want a relationship in college.

I was asked out for a total of two dates in college. It sucked. :(

I get asked out all the time now. :cool:

I'm sorry. Thats really crappy, esp. since girls are so often complaining about no dating- and then one will go and do that. Puts in a bad rep for us all.

About the $$$ factor -- are there seriously women who DON'T pay for their half on a date? I always assume that we're going dutch unless someone says otherwise. Friendly arguing over the check is fine, and if one person really wants to pay that's cool, but it would never even occur to me not to at least seriously offer to pay for half.

I used to take my girlfriend out all the time. What people are saying in this thread is true though. It's just too expensive to do on a consistant basis! And I know girls (hot ones) that haven't been on a real 'date' in years. I don't like that I've let her buy on occasion. I'm kind of traditional in that respect. I don't order for her or anything but I'm still old-school in the whole opening doors for her, buying the meal and all.

But it's a hell of a strain on the pocket book. I might take her out 2-3 times a month now.

Why is that crappy? She just wasn't interested in a future with him. It happens all the time.

Kevlar, don't let this experience turn you off dating. Just because she doesn't think that you two have a future, doesn't mean that you won't meet someone else who thinks that you are wonderful. I had dates with about half a dozen guys before I met my boyfriend. It was well worth the effort. :D

Valkyrie, I never pay for a date unless I ask the guy out or it's his birthday or another celebration for him. I think that a gentleman always pays. :) I don't ask for expensive restaurants or the theater. They can take me out on a bargain date.

Not necessarily. It would depend on how she said it and what the context was, etc.

I went out on a date (and I asked him out) and I spent the entire time talking to myself. He said maybe 10 words the whole night. He then had the nerve to ask me if he could pend the night and I told him he would have to sleep on the floor (at this point I was completely uninterested...you say nothing all night and then wants some azz...I don't think so), so he got all pissy and left.
The next day he called and asked me if I saw a long term relationship (after 1 date!). I said no, and I didn't think we should see each other anymore. So he went on a rampage about how women sucked.

So basically he just gave himself a bad rep, and I'm sure there are plenty more guys that act like that. Don't fault the girl for telling the truth.