3rd time's the charm?
 

Some may know that I rushed twice. My freshmen year and then again my sophomore year. Both unhappy endings and I really thought the second time around I stood a chance. I thought everything went really well, I was actually having fun and then became heartbroken quickly. Every party I was at I felt so comfortable. I was so excited about rush the second time and being in each party it felt so right. I can't really explain it but it was just wonderful. Everytime I see the greek week signs, shirts, and so forth I feel like I'm missing out. So, I was thinking, I've done the recruitment each fall that it feels like the thing to do. That maybe if I did approach the idea again that it could be a happy ending but it's becoming sad. Girls that I rushed with from the very beginning who didn't get into a group but then did the second time around, and all the girls in my group who found their home, I guess I would just feel like a loser?

Any suggestions, comments? How would you feel if you saw the same person maybe a 3rd time?

I'm really regretting my screen name

Aww, honey . . . that sounds rough. *hugs* for you.

Do you attend one of those big Greek schools where it's almost impossible to get a bid after freshman year, or is it possible that you may have just slipped through the cracks both times?

I would definitely recommend doing it again, just because of this: if it's something you want that badly, you'll always kick yourself for not trying it next year, because you'll never know if you MIGHT have made it this time. I know it's scary, but you'll probably always regret it if you don't.

Here's my thought:

I just read through your rush thread from last year... You definately had a bad situation on your final night of rush.

I say if you're going to regret this forever, go for it. But you may want to be a little more aggressive this year--try to get recs for at least the groups you liked last year. Speak up for yourself if you get in a bad situation. However, you need to be prepared for the worst. :( At some schools rushing as a junior is going to be very, very difficult.

Please PM me... I have a friend at school that this happened to... I'd love to chat about it (I'm also membership chair for my sorority, so I know my stuff).

Incidentally, too, there's a GCer here that rushed 3 times, didn't get a bid the first two times, and is now a KD! I bet she'd have some sound advice too, I'll find her screenname for you if I can...

It's GiantsChic... Seach her name and you should find her rush threads, all three of them! :) :)

We have a sister who rushed three times as well....her situation was a little different in that she kept declining the bids that were extended to her, but on the third try, she accepted and loves sorority as much as the rest of the sisters who accepted their first bids.

I say, if it's something you really want (and I'm guessing you do since you're asking us about it) then you should go for it! Best of Luck no matter the decision!

Follow your heart and go for it! If you don't, you'll always wonder "what if".

I remember your rush thread from this past fall; it made me so mad!
me reading TBSG's rush thread ---> :mad:

Go through this year, and don't change a thing. YOU did everything right! Stay your own sweet self.

TBSG at rush ---> :)

I hope the sisters at that one house acquired some rushing skills and aren't so ---> :confused: :confused: :confused:

Hey there! ToBeSororityGrl, I tried to send you a PM, but your box was full :( Please e-mail me at GiantsChic76@yahoo.com if you have a chance... I totally went through rush 3 times... first 2 times were horrible... i felt heartbroken when things didn't work out, but figured that if I really wanted it, I'd give it one more try- so I went through formal rush again- and can happily say that I am now a very happy member of Kappa Delta :) this house was my first choice from the beginning, even though I went in totally open minded... I really hope things work out for you, and would love to talk to you :)

I was just re-reading TBSG's Recruitment thread, and it seems like a mess. I am so sorry that you had a disappointing experience. I think that if you want to be in a sorority then go through rush again. I know a woman who rushed several times (3 or 4) before she finally got a bid as a junior. It meant so much to her. Good luck! :)

TBSG -- I would definately say to go for it. You seem to really really want this, and I agree with everyone when they say if you don't, you'll always wonder "what if".

I have only been through informal rush, but to be honest, at the beginning, I wasn't really sure if I really wanted to. Now I am sooooooo happy I did, because I absolutely love all the girls here!! :) And I know if I didn't go through with it, I would have wondered "what if" after college was over.

You seem very devoted to this, and I think any sorority would lucky to have such a devoted member. :) Best of luck!

I don't know if it's impossible to get a bid as a class other than the freshmen. I know there were girls that rushed again as sophomores and it seemed like they all found their home, and there was a junior who rushed because the previous year she was inelegible because she was a RA, but I don't think it's very prominent. I know last year I felt so out of place being a sophomore but my freshmen year my rho chi group was half sophomores so then I felt out of place again.

I guess I'm just realllly scared if it's a big let down again. I'm one of those people that when I get excited about something I think about it a lot and devote a lot of time to it and that just makes the rejection ten times worse ya know?

I guess my real question is, at all the rush, informal or what not how many of you have seen girls who had been there before? Did you look down upon them? I know that seems harsh to say, but I mean did you feel bad for them or something? OR did you think to yourself, wow that's a girl with courage and dedication to try again?

We had a girl go through informal & formal a combined 4 times. I had seen her at all of these events, and no, I didn't look down on her at all. She had her heart set on a house, and even though I don't agree with that method of rushing, I admired her tenacity, hoped everything worked out great for her, and wished that she would have taken our bid. :)

Like MoxieGrrl, most of the girls I've seen go through multiple times are looking for one particular house - they've gotten bids elsewhere. But then, recruitment was not competitive at all on my campus! The number of girls who didn't get bids was so tiny - you had to work hard, like not bathe, not to get one. (Or you suicided a popular chapter, in which case they just COBed you next semester.)

Personally, I know if I hadn't gotten a bid, I would have said, "Screw 'em if they don't want me." I'm not saying that's the correct attitude; I think it speaks to a certain lack of patience on my part (if you can't join them, beat them). So I admire your tenacity; you aren't doing the sour grapes routine.

I should think other Greek women on your camps could give you the best advice. Are there any sisters you're personally close to? Because recruitment does differ so much from campus to campus. And being friends with the sisters is the best way to get a bid anywhere.

Just out of curiousity, did you look into any of the other orgs, like Prim Roses or OPhiA?

Edited to add: Was OPhiA on campus? I can't remember. Anyway, I looked at the pages for the Prim Roses and Sigma Chi Delta and was very impressed by them both. They out-NPC any NPC org on my campus!

I dropped out of rush my freshman year, but still really thought I belonged in Sigma. I had alot of friends in the chapter and really fell in love with it. My sophomore year, I rushed again with (a closed mind yes, but with only 3 chapters on campus I knew which one was right for me!) and my heart set on Sigma. I remember the first night of formal I walked into the Sigma room and it felt soooo right. I knew I would finally make it through rush week. Well, when invites went out I was shocked to see that Sigma was the only sorority to cut me!!!!! I was devestated. I dropped out of rush right then and was really depressed about it the rest of the week. Then, informal rolled around and Sigma's started inviting me to thier events. I went to their Christmas party and the full week of informal rush. It was only then, on my third try, that I finally found a home. Just because you're cut once doesn't mean you'll always be cut. HOWEVER, it was nerve racking, it was stressful, it was hard. Just be prepared for that. I have to say though, the benefits of my third time in the pool far outweighed the stress. And now i love my sisters more than anything in the world. Good luck, it's possible, because I've done it.