Gay fraternity adds 24th chapter at FIU
 

Sat, Jan. 18, 2003

FIU gay group aims to become fraternity
STEVE ROTHAUS
Outlooks




STEVE ROTHAUS


Jose S. Mateo, a gay Florida International University freshman, is candid about why he didn't feel comfortable in a traditional fraternity with straight frat brothers.

''When they're talking about their girlfriends, and you're talking about your boyfriend, they're going to be a little weirded out,'' said Mateo, 18, who last June graduated from Coral Park High School in West Miami-Dade County.

Wanting to be a part of campus fraternity life, however, Mateo and 26 other gay FIU students -- most of them Hispanic young men from Miami-Dade and Broward counties -- have launched their own group, Gamma Lambda Mu.

''It is to offer gay college students and gay-friendly college students a social group and a place where they feel comfortable to be who they are,'' said group president Mario O. Campa, 21, a visual-arts major who graduated in 1999 from St. Brendan High in Southwest Dade.

''The one thing that everyone has in common is that they are gay and have the same experiences coming out with family and friends,'' said Jorge Casas, Gamma Lambda Mu's vice president and finance chairman. ``They should know they're never alone. There's always a support group to turn to. That's one of the reasons we started this.''

This month, leaders of Delta Lambda Phi, a national fraternity for ''gay, bisexual and progressive gentlemen,'' will come to FIU and colonize Gamma Lambda Mu.

''We're going to affiliate at the end of January with Delta Lambda Phi, the first gay men's fraternity, which was founded in Washington, D.C., in 1986,'' said Casas, 22, an FIU senior studying psychology. ''They'll give us a few pointers on how to run the colony,'' he said. ``The colony is the first step before you become a chapter.''

Gamma Lambda Mu would be Florida's only gay fraternity, according to Clayton Wilkerson Jr. of Delta Lambda Phi.

Wilkerson said the FIU group is ''very driven in its goal'' to become a chapter.

''It's one of our largest groups to come in, ever,'' said Wilkerson, 23, of North Carolina State University. ``Their school is one of the most actively involved in the formation of their group. We've never had a campus so involved in getting the group off the ground.''

Casas, a 1998 graduate of La Salle High School in Coconut Grove, said it has been smooth sailing for the group (both on and off campus) since he and the others started it last summer.

''I've been shocked how well this fraternity has been accepted by our families,'' Casas said. ``My parents think it's a great idea.

''The university itself has been great,'' he said. ''We've had a lot of support from the faculty. We've gotten a really good response'' from the FIU office of Greek Affairs.

FIU President Modesto ''Mitch'' Maidique fully supports Gamma Lambda Mu.

''FIU is a big tent and a very entrepreneurial, diverse university,'' Maidique said. ``In that spirit, I'm glad that these students have taken the initiative to create a fraternity where they can associate with friends and support each other.''

The group's faculty advisor is Todd Martinez-Padilla Simmons, FIU's media director.

''They would be the first chapter of this national gay fraternity in Florida. They would be No. 24 in the nation,'' Simmons said.

''The university has taken steps the past few years to make the environment more supportive of gay and lesbian students. From the president on down here, I've felt very strong support to be out and open,'' said Simmons, 40, a longtime Florida gay activist.

FIU's other fraternities mostly are accepting of the gay group, according to Casas.

A few, though, have made fun of Gamma Lambda Mu.

''They were ridiculing what our rituals might be like, what our initiation might be like,'' Casas said.

Insults are ignored, he said.

Members meet potential controversy head on by wearing navy T-shirts that read, ``Gamma Lambda Mu Fall 2002. Let's give 'em something to talk about!''

Already, Gamma Lambda Mu members have worn their T-shirts at Homecoming events, the Greek walkathon for United Way and a Miami Children's Hospital fundraiser.

One rule, however, that other FIU fraternities don't have: Brothers are not allowed to romance each other lest the frat become a dating service.

''We have a hands-off policy,'' Casas said. ``That's from Delta Lambda Phi's national office.''

ON THE WEB
• For more about the fraternities, visit their websites:

• Gamma Lambda Mu, www.fiu.edu/~gamma.


• Delta Lambda Phi, www.dlp.org.

Re: Gay fraternity adds 24th chapter at FIU
 

Maybe it’s just me but I don’t see this one happening. I know some of the co-ed business fraternities have the same rule but it doesn’t seem to stop them.

Re: Re: Gay fraternity adds 24th chapter at FIU
 

That's interesting. Which ones do you believe have this rule?

I know our local chapter of A Phi O has rules about brothers not dating pledges, but it still happens.

Good for these guys. We have a guy in a fraternity at our school who is gay, and his fraternity is always made fun of for it. When they held a convention, apparently all the other chapters did was make fun of them too. That made me really upset. I hope that these men are comfortable in their fraternal home.

Re: Re: Re: Gay fraternity adds 24th chapter at FIU
 

Well according to my last roommate who was president of his chapter of Delta Sigma Pi, this was a rule that they had. If I am mistaken, I am sure you will be able to set me straight.

Kevlar281, there is no such existing rule in our National Bylaws. Perhaps it was something in the local chapter's bylaws about that? :)

astroAphi, that is very disturbing what happened to the chapter you are talking about... especially when they attended conference.

Re: Gay fraternity adds 24th chapter at FIU
 

Sigma Guy International

these guys have come a long way in a short time and they are commended for it here @ FIU...
as for the hands off policy, they are adhering to it as far as i know...

but i must admit i LOVED those shirts!!!:D

It's unfortunate that the mainstream Greek system isn't offering a home to these young men, but at the same time, it's great that they are dealing with that prejudice by creating a more welcoming place.

As for dating each other...well, based on my experience with college groups of all kinds (including a cappella groups and sports teams), a "no hookups" rule may get thrown out the window once in a while. We are talking about 18-22 year olds! But I bet it happens now and then in "straight" chapters, too. If these guys are as serious about brotherhood as they sound, they're going to succeed, regardless.

Ivy

they are pretty welcomed on this campus...they've held mixers w/ sororities on campus and participated in many campus events...

They are pretty welcomed on this campus...they've held mixers w/
sororities on campus and participated in many campus events...

That's very interesting. I guess the ladies must enjoy a mixer where
the point doesn't involve getting hit on...

Somehow if the situation were reversed (i.e. a special interest
sorority for lesbian women having a mixer with a fraternity) I just
don't think it would work...

Sorry if I seem crass but I find this topic fascinating.

As for the "no hookups" rule, that's very ironic. I mean mainstream
"straight" fraternities have taboos against the exact same thing.
Sooner or later two of the guys are going to fall in love. What are
they going to do? Keep it in the closet? The love that dare not
speak its name? Like I said, the irony runs deep...

What's sadder is that they HOSTED the conference.

Well good for them!!!!
I know that on my campus, homosexual men are for the most part welcomed into the fraternities(and are loved by all of the girls!), but if these young men felt that they needed a group of their own, more power to them!
I wish them well and hope that they get out of their brotherhood all that they are looking for!

Makes me wish we had chapters like that here at Mason...

I went to the Pride Festival in D.C. this past summer and they had a kiosk there and it made me happy to see a gay fraternity. I wish the lesbian national sorority was as actively expanding cuz I might consider joining! But at the same time, it makes me sad that there's even a need for them... I guess I'm lucky my sisters have been so accepting.

My school was the first to welcome Delta Lambda Phi into the school IFC as a full member just last year, and they are a small but active chapter. I only know one or two of the guys, but they are sweethearts. I think they're so small because I know of only one guy that has ever had a problem with being "out" and member of a fraternity. They love participating in Greek Week and Homecoming from what i can tell, although they're so small they get paired up with 2 other fraternities and a sorority .