Two years in a row......please send help
 

Hey everyone! My oldest daughter went through recruitment last fall at Arkansas, and now my youngest daughter will be going through it this fall at Georgia. UARK’s was brutal. I’m wondering how recruitment at UGA will be in comparison. I finally recovered from last year, and now having to go through it again. Any words of wisdom?

Having survived SEC rushes, I would say: tell her to meet as many members as possible so that someone might stand up for her in membership selection sessions. Also be prepared for big cuts and be open to all the sororities.

Also, make sure your daughter has letters of recommendation for every chapter on campus.

At my school (in the Northeast) recs weren't so important - I actually never saw one - but at schools where recruitment is highly competitive, they are crucial.

Yes, recs are a must.

Fortunately DD #2 is now a legacy thanks to her big sister. And maybe through you also? Some chapters really value their legacies - although you won't know that until recruitment from the other side in 2019. Good luck to your daughter! Remember we're here for support.

Make sure DD #1 fills out whatever legacy forms are necessary and gets them uploaded online or sent to the chapter.

I would assume that ALL groups value their legacies. Some groups have more than they can take in a pledge class and they also have to take in effect whether the legacy is actually a fit for their chapter. Again, make sure your daughter has all her options available to her with introductions.

Yes, legacy opportunities are wonderful, but it is not always the right fit. Each person should find her own niche. If that is the legacy house, it is icing on the cake.

My suggestion would be send in the legacy form her sister’s sorority chapter, but do NOT list legacy/Greek affiliation on the Panhellenic recruitment form.

My thoughts:

1) Make sure she doesn't think her legacy status means anything because with so many legacies rushing at a competitive school, it doesn't. I've seen many girls think it will get them a bid. It doesn't always, not even for chapter legacies (and many chapters at super competitive schools don't consider non-chapter legacies with quite the same regard as chapter legacies).

2) Brush up on her conversational skills - there are girls who are a bit quiet, albeit wonderful people, but who don't know how to carry a good conversation that will make them memorable in a good way; you don't have to be outgoing to connect, but you can't be too quiet. And if she's a talker, make sure she doesn't hog the conversation. Look to genuinely connect, not just chat.

3) I suspect UGA is a very competitive rush, as many SEC schools are, so everything will need to be polished - her outfits/style (true to herself, but in line with current trends for rush), her resume, recs, etc. Every little thing counts at a competitive school.

4) And lastly, be open to every single house. Many girls get stuck on one or two houses and then are devastated when they're dropped. One never knows where they might fit and sometimes it's a surprise!

5) And to every mom I know whose daughter is rushing - try to relax and simply support your daughter in finding her way. You've already been down this path once so that should help. Daughters benefit the most when a mom is gently supportive and reassuring, no matter what happens. And her sister should make it known that she's fine with whatever sorority she pledges since sometimes legacies feel pressure to join the same house.

Very true.

My sorority's legacy practice is that any legacy (sister, daughter, or granddaughter of an AEPhi) participating in formal recruitment is invited to the first invitational round after open houses, provided she meets minimum GPA. If a legacy is invited to pref, she will be on the first bid list. But the chapter is under no obligation to invite the legacy to any parties after the first invitational round. If the chapter feels the legacy isn't a good fit, the legacy will not be invited back.

AND, if the legacy feels she's not a good fit for the chapter, she can always rank that chapter as a last choice, and if she ends up at their pref party, she can always ISP or not sign a pref card.

I do not have children of my own, and I'm an only child as is my husband (so no nieces), so I will never be in your shoes. That said, the best advice I can give is to listen to your daughter, be her sounding board, and try to relax. And, if you drink, get a couple of bottles of good wine.

Even if she ends up at her legacy house for pref,if they are not her first choice, she can rank the legacy last. The goal is for a PNM to get matched with the chapter she places first on her bid card. If that chapter fills to quota before the PNM's name comes up on their list, the computer will try to match her with her 2nd choice, and if that doesn't work out, then to her 3rd choice if she attends 3pref parties, and ranks all 3. If she chooses to leave a sorority off her bid card or To ISP-list only one on her bid card- she is automatically eliminated from being a quota addition, should she not receive a bid from her choice(s). She would be eligible for any COB opportunities or colonizations.

Recruitment at UGA can be brutal, too, especially if you think only certain sororities are worth your time. DO NOT listen to the tent talk. She needs to see which sororities she likes the best, but be open to all of them.

The schedule alone for UGA rush is crushing. Add heat, the innate drama of that many young women congregating. It is not an easy rush. For the PNMs, the actives, and Moms. You will all be exhausted.

With 19 sororities in play, make sure she takes notes and keeps an open mind. All 19 are housed, all 19 are huge - so if she doesn't click with a specific person in one sorority, they have a bunch of other members.

Recs. Gotta gotta have them. Start hitting up friends now.

Legacy status is great, but not ironclad. I had a roommate who was cut from Mom/Grandma/Aunt/Cousin sorority. THE NIGHT BEFORE PREFS. Womp wommmmmp.

Start by looking at The Pointer:

https://issuu.com/ugapanhellenic/doc...f_single_pages

And beyond that, cute, cool, comfortable wardrobe.

For you, Xanax. Better living through pharmaceuticals.

1. UGA is brutal. The schedule is long very early days and bid night is typically the first day of class...which is crazy cruel.
2. Conversational skills are the key so she should focus on authentic conversational skills.
3. It is hot. As in humid hot.
4. No group is bound by legacy status. If they like you, they like you. It's drama-rama central.
5. It is hot. As in humid hot.
6. It is hot. As in humid hot.
7. Your daughter is awesome where ever she may land....even if she decides greek is not for her. And that is the message she needs to hear from you. Whatever happens does not define her.