Aaaaaggggghhhhhh
 

OK... I need to vent, so disregard this message if you feel you need to :D

Well here's my situation... before transferring here I decided to go ahead and live on campus for the first semester until I 'got the feel of things' and I figured I could move out and get my own apartment during the spring semester.

Before transferring here, I was a Resident Assistant at my other school, no naturally I am just used to living by myself. I am a major neat freak, and I can only study in *ABSOLTE* silence. Since my major consists of using computer a lot, I naturally study in my room.

Anyhow, I got assigned a roomie, which was no big deal. She lived 30 mins away from home so the only thing she really brought was clothes and bedding. I live 9 hours away, so I brought EVERYTHING. My roomie was cool with it and she was a really great person.

We got along *great*.. but 2 weeks into the semester she decided the 4-year university thing wasn't for her. She withdrew from school and moved out. Since then, I haven't completely "taken over" the other 1/3 of the room, but I have found the extra space kind of comfy since I brought a lot of stuff and as mentioned before, I'm used to living alone since I was an RA.

Here's the catch. Two days ago, I was studying hard for stats and I get a knock at my door. It was a girl who had a list of all the rooms with vacancies. She wanted to move out of her room because she was uncomfortable with her roomie. (Her roomie.. umm... "had relations" at all hours of the day/night regardless if the girl was there or not)

I felt really bad. She told me all sorts of crazy things like she's manic depressant and her mom is bi-polar.. basically stuff I probably wouldn't tell someone I had met for 5 seconds. I could tell right off we wouldn't get along. She can't study without some sort of background noise. I study *a lot* and that would drive me crazy. She said she doesn't care if her room is messy or what... I'm a major neat freak. I couldn't stand to see the room messy even if it wasn't "my side" of the room. It would drive me absolute bananas! She also mentioned she has "a lot of big stuff"... hmmm this isn't a big room. And the main reason space wasn't a big deal for me & my previous roomie is because we agreed during the summer I would take all the "big stuff"... there is hardly room for more "big stuff". And during our chit chat, I mentioned my GLO and she just kinda said "oh. i really look down on all those sororities and fraternities no matter what kind they are..." and she proceeded to tell me how useless it was ... etc. etc. kind of upset me if you know what I mean.

Since this is campus housing, I guess I don't really have a say in who she moves in with, however I just wouldn't think it would be smart (if she was smart enough to realize how we wouldn't mesh too well) to move in with someone who obviously isn't compatible.

I have been deathly scared the past couple of days that I will come back from class or somewhere else to see her stuff moved in!!!!

Ok .. there is my rant... :D

Have you talked to student residence about this? If you go to them and tell them that you are uncomfortable living with this girl, they probably won't let it happen. I can't imagine that they would let her move in without telling you first. That would be so wrong.

I understand your situation, and hindsight is always better.. but I think you messed up by not telling her you dont think it would work out from the get-go. If it gets to housing, they wont care, and you could be stuck. However if you had said, "I think we are just really different people, etc." She might have gotten the hint. I dunno. Good luck tho..

Wow.....that sounds crazy! But if you school is anything like mine, you can say "no" to her living with you. The bottom line is that you were there first. Plus, it sounds like she had a list of people to choose from. I would suggest going to the housing director and making your concerns known. Seriously, I work with people that suffer from depression and manic depression...when they are not on their medicine......it is *not* a pretty picture and not conducive to a studying environment. Good luck with this situation!

I agree... I'm too nice sometimes and i hate that about me :( Do you all think I should talk to the hall director here?

I would definitely talk to your hall director. It may turn out that they would never put you two together anyway, but I think it's always better to be safe than sorry. :) I don't know how your school operates, but mine never informed anyone that they were getting a new roommate in advance. I learned that lesson the hard way...

After having my dorm room to myself for two quarters during my freshman year, I was shocked to find someone else's things in my room one day. :eek: Luckily, the girl and I got along, but I still felt that it was wrong for the school to put someone else in my room without advance notification.

Why not just tell her in person up front? It's not about being nice...it's about not making a fear based decision. Just let her know that you would be uncomfortable living with her for all those reasons and you will not change so she should look for someone who is messy and not into sororities. Your time is too valuable to deal with half the crap she would bring into your life.

-Rudey
--And if she still talks smack, pop her in the lip.

Just don't give her the OK to move in. Do like everyone has said and talk to the hall director...if you HAVE to have a roommate, tell them you want someone else who's more compatible with you. Seriously, this sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. I've had two bad roommates (not that they were bad people, we just didn't get along), and it's not fun--and if you know up front that it won't work out, save yourself (and her) the trouble of possibly becoming mortal enemies. Well, maybe not THAT, but you know...;)

Talk to your RA, housing chair, housemaster, etc. - if they don't have the power to keep her from moving in, they'll at least have some influence. It sounds like there are other vacancies in housing, so it's not like she HAS to room with you.

I like AchtungBaby's suggestion - if they do try to have her move in with you, ask one of your friends to room with you, and tell the housing office psycho-girl can have your friend's old spot.

I totally agree, but Aephi alum has the right idea too. Talk to everyone possible to get out of living with this girl.

OK.. well when I posted the original thread, i went downstairs and talked to the hall director ASAP. I was told that not to worry because she would just take care of it.

WELL today I come back from class and lo and behold! there is a note on my door saying she finally got the paperwork to move in with me :mad: Don't get me wrong, i'm not anti-social or anything, but i was told it was already going to be taken care of... and i never even got notice of the change.

So I went downstairs to see what was up.. since this girl took like 2 weeks to decide on who she wanted to move in with, the hall director totally forgot we spoke.. so when i went downstairs again to refresh her memory all she could say was "I'm sorry I forgot" GRRRRRRR

she told ME to contact her to reiterate that i didn't think we would be very compatible roomies and to contact the front desk.
so i did that.. i tried calling her, but just got her machine. left a polite message, and went back downstairs to see what else i had to do. i have night class tonight and didn't want to come back with all her stuff here. The front desk people said they were going to try contacting her also....

grrrrrr

omg! that totally sounds like it sucks. I don't think its fair that they can just let someone come in like that. can you tell the girl that you don't want to live with her-- i mean in a nice way?

yea maggie, i'm trying! i can't get in touch with her though.. i have tried calling her a bazillion times. i left one polite message on her answering machine telling her she was a really nice girl, but i didn't think we would be very compatible roomies.

the front desk people are telling me they will be trying to get in touch with her to find other arrangements & stuff, because if we are really not going to get along, she would be trading one set of roomie problems for another.... so i don't know..

Drink!

lol yea that's what i'm thinking.

the hall director just called and asked if the reason i didn't want to room with this girl was just because i didn't want a roomie.

umm no. i went on to discuss a bunch of the reasons why i didn't think it was going to be working out and she seemed to somewhat understand.

so i don't know exactly what is going to happen. the hall director informed me that i could go to the housing office and request a private room for an extra fee of course... like i'm not going to be paying them enough just to move out of here. :(