Hurtful words
 

What do people say that either hurt your feelings or make you depressed?
I constantly have guys I like tell me they aren't interested in me bc they aren't attracted to me. Okay I know that sounds shallow, but that is one thing that really hurts bc it makes me feel ugly. Right now I have a crush on a guy and he told me that he isn't attracted to me. SO now when I see him I feel worthless in a way, oh yeah he is one of my friends too that I just met in Florida. I have agreat group of friends and of course I had to fall for one.
It also hurts my feelings when I hear that my ex bf is still mad at me--bc I was mad at her for something-- we haven't talked since Sigma CHi Derby days.:(

I'm sorry. :( I wish I could help! But just remember that a lot of times, people say things that sort of come out wrong...i.e. they open their mouths without thinking, and put their foot in it. And some people are just oblivious to the fact that what they say might be hurtful to someone else.

:(

Re: Hurtful words
 

I don't think you really need anyone to talk about what words hurt them - I'm sure most of those words are universal. You have every right to feel hurt if someone isn't attracted to you. But in my opinion, at this stage in your life most people are dispensible. If one has no attraction to you, someone else will. You just have to have the right attitude about it and not feel too sorry for yourself. To each his own, right?

-Rudey
--And have you tried wearing a cowboy hat with a backless shirt? I swear they totally turn guys on.

Re: Hurtful words
 

Lana,

Please don't be sad! Just because a few guys you've come across aren't "attracted" to you, it in no way means you're ugly! I bet you're beautiful inside and out, and I know that someday somebody is going to really, truly cherish and appreciate that beauty! You are NOT worthless!... but these guys are definitely not worth your time.

Forget your ex-boyfriend... he's just that, an EX. He's not part of your life anymore, and you shouldn't weigh his opinions too heavily. You know that old saying: "All good things in life are worth waiting for"... well, just wait a teensy bit longer and I'm positive that you'll find the guy that's right for you!

I hope you feel better soon.

XOXO,
Annie.

Oops I should have mad that more clear-- by ex bf I meant EX BEST FRIEND-Liz,.
I am so pathetic, on my campus they have movie night and tonight they showed Mr. Deeds and when he makes a special date with his girl so he can ask her to marry her--I began to cry bc all I could think of was the fact that no guy will ever do that for me(by this time I've had 4 beers). Now all my friends want toknow what's wrong and I feel like such an idiot so I cant' tell them," The movie really made me think of how no man will ever love me the way I would love them. Either I meet guys that have had long term relationships(which I have never had) or I meet guys that are unattracted to me." So no way am I going to tell my girl friends (the 2 I have in Fl) nor will I tell my Guy friends for sure.
I've felt this way since high school--lonely!!! I want a guy to love me so bad and I can't explain it-- bc I have a close relationship with my dad and I know sometimes on tv they say poor relationships with fathers cause problems with relationships.
This is no way a pity party for me. I think that I am severley depressed, but I really don't want medication or counseling.

As for your best friend, Liz, she's still an EX! If she can't be mature enough to be civil to you, then SCREW HER. It's her loss.

Please don't feel bad... you're still really young! There's somebody out there for you.

And hey, we can have a pity party if you want to. Break out the Ben&Jerry's!

XOXO,
Annie.

If you are depressed, go to the campus counseling center. Also get a physical because sometimes there is an physical reason for depression. Alcohol can also make people feel more depressed so stay away from that. There is nothing wrong with therapy and medication if you need it. I hope that helps.

I sometimes felt the way that you described when I was in college. Will anyone ever love me? It isn't a pity party. Fill you time with positive things such as school, volunteer work, a job, making new friends, and strengthening existing friendships and relationships with family.

I hope that you feel better. If you think that you are depressed, please seek couseling. It could be a step in the right direction.