As the Summer Breaks wind down...it's time for a STORY
 

On a nice lovely, rain-free Sunday afternoon, I am sipping on ice-cold PINK lemonade and enjoying my new book by E. Lynn Harris. While enjoying my cool, refreshing brew, I abruptly stop reading and reflect on how the time has swiftly passed by.

Just then, I...

Thought about that fine hunk of man I left behind in Louisiana. That man was so fine he could make you melt with one touch. Things would have really worked out between us if.............

He didn't have that awful laugh. Sounded like a wounded elephant. Luckily, he liked psychological thrillers and not comedies! Which brings me to the one time, when we were at the movies...

***Sidebar***
When I first read the name of the thread...I saw "As summer breaks wind..." I was sitting here thinking :confused:
Who is Summer, and why is there a thread about her breaking wind?? LOL! :D
***End of Sidebar***

He turned to me just as the final credits were rolling. He looked deep into my eyes- almost as if he were trying to see my soul- and asked...

If I wore thongs and would I like to ride the rodeo backwards!
I looked at him and said..........................

Hell Naw!!! What kind of woman do you think I am?!?!?! Just then that skank Shanteka walked by. I guess she had overheard what he asked because she said "I'll ride you like a rodeo backwards." So he looked at me and said "Holla" and left with Shanteka.

I was trippin because he was my ride home. I wasn't tryin to walk because I had on my five inch stilletto heels. Just then I saw . . . . .


***Sidebar***

I am LMAO @ librasoul with her "Who is Summer and why is there a thread about her breaking wind?" because I was thinking the same thing!

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...the man I was going to marry! He was a smooth deep chocolate with a body sculpted by the gods and a breathtaking smile. So I sauntered over to him, smiled and said...

"You must be an Ice Cold brother of Alpha Phi Alpha because when I looked at you, I was frozen in place. I just knew that I had to make my way over here to find out if I can get to know you better." That's when.....

He kissed me gently on my hand and led me to his Black 600 Mercedes Benz with the 22 inch gold rims. Then we.......

Just had to stop by his baby's momma's house. I did not appreciate that, but that's what I got for leaving my car in my drive way.

When we pulled up, she was sitting on the porch, with his son in just a diaper, and she was listening to, "My neck, my back" and she was singing every word.

I felt sorry for him, having a baby's momma like that and all. I stayed in the car, while he walked to the porch.

The first thing out of old girl's mouth was....

"Man! That's my jam! Me an Khia is cousins. You ain't know? I helped her write that song, only she revised what I had said. My song was 'My Breast, My - '" At that point I turned the car radio on, full blast. Luckily, my song was on, the one that always calms me down...

And then he came back and apologized. I accepted it. Then we went back to his place and I noticed ,damn, that brother has a nice cucumber (sp?) on him. Oops, there goes my shirt over my head and my skirt going down to my feet. I was getting very excited until I found out he was wearing a "bulge enhancing brief" :mad:............

When I found that "bulge-enhancing brief," I lost it and started pounding on him.

He had this look of utter horror on his face, especially when I was really angry and rushed to the kitchen drawer...

And pulled out the ice cream scooper. I don't know what I planning on doing with it, and neither did he.


Needless to say that he called me a "Crazy B", and then made himself scarce.

I sat down at my kitchen table and wondered how my day had come to this.

Then I realized that my day had started going downhill when...

This morning at the crack of dawn there was a loud crash outside. I get up and look out the window and there is a woman outside with a brick. The heffa just broke out my man's window shield. I wake him up and tell him some girl it outside going postal. He says.......