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-   -   Sorority Recommendation Questions (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=139139)

MadelineM 02-19-2014 07:03 PM

Sorority Recommendation Questions
 
I will be transferring to Auburn next semester. I know I need recommendations but so far I have only found two-three people. Is it absolutely necessary to have recommendations for every single sorority? I don't understand how I am supposed to find 17 alumni from 17 different sororities! In addition, will having a recommendation help my chances a lot/hurt me if I don't have them? Since they are so popular, I don't know whether listing them would hurt my chances of receiving a bid even if I have recs. Would it make more sense to list popular sororities that I have recs for or less popular sororities that I don't have recs for? Sorry if that made no sense but thank you!!!

AZTheta 02-19-2014 07:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MadelineM (Post 2261923)
I will be transferring to Auburn next semester. I know I need recommendations but so far I have only found two-three people. Is it absolutely necessary to have recommendations for every single sorority? I don't understand how I am supposed to find 17 alumni from 17 different sororities! In addition, will having a recommendation help my chances a lot/hurt me if I don't have them? Since they are so popular, I don't know whether listing them would hurt my chances of receiving a bid even if I have recs. Would it make more sense to list popular sororities that I have recs for or less popular sororities that I don't have recs for? Sorry if that made no sense but thank you!!!

Have you looked through the Recruitment forum yet? There are some great threads on how to obtain recommendations.

Do not ask for recommendations here on Greek Chat. Of course you weren't planning to, right?

Not sure what you mean about popular. At least, I hope you don't mean what I think you mean.

MadelineM 02-19-2014 07:24 PM

I would never ask for recommendations online... I'm only asking people I know of course. By popular I just mean that a lot of girls want to get into those specific sororities and they are hard ones to get into.. Sorry if that's what you thought I meant? But I don't see how that's offensive in any way.

ASTalumna06 02-19-2014 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MadelineM (Post 2261923)
I will be transferring to Auburn next semester. I know I need recommendations but so far I have only found two-three people. Is it absolutely necessary to have recommendations for every single sorority? I don't understand how I am supposed to find 17 alumni from 17 different sororities! In addition, will having a recommendation help my chances a lot/hurt me if I don't have them? Since they are so popular, I don't know whether listing them would hurt my chances of receiving a bid even if I have recs. Would it make more sense to list popular sororities that I have recs for or less popular sororities that I don't have recs for? Sorry if that made no sense but thank you!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by MadelineM (Post 2261926)
I would never ask for recommendations online... I'm only asking people I know of course. By popular I just mean that a lot of girls want to get into those specific sororities and they are hard ones to get into.. Sorry if that's what you thought I meant? But I don't see how that's offensive in any way.

QFP

FSUZeta 02-19-2014 07:51 PM

Yes Madeline, you should have a recommendation,or two, for each of the 17 sororities. Usually if you find one sorority alumna, she will know women who are members of other sororities. Ordinarily these women are happy to help connect the PNM with the other sorority members. There are several threads spelling out how to get recommendations in the Recruitment Forum, as well as several Auburn threads.

irishpipes 02-19-2014 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MadelineM (Post 2261923)
I will be transferring to Auburn next semester. I know I need recommendations but so far I have only found two-three people. Is it absolutely necessary to have recommendations for every single sorority? I don't understand how I am supposed to find 17 alumni from 17 different sororities! In addition, will having a recommendation help my chances a lot/hurt me if I don't have them? Since they are so popular, I don't know whether listing them would hurt my chances of receiving a bid even if I have recs. Would it make more sense to list popular sororities that I have recs for or less popular sororities that I don't have recs for? Sorry if that made no sense but thank you!!!

Where are you thinking that you would list recs?

And yes, at Auburn you need recs for every sorority. Even those pesky less-popular ones.

maconmagnolia 02-19-2014 08:03 PM

As FSUZeta said, you NEED at least one, if not two, recommendations for each sorority at any SEC school. If you are having trouble getting recommendations, ask the women who have already written some for you if they know any women from other sororities who could write a recommendation. If you've absolutely exhausted all of your contacts (teachers, parent's coworkers/friends, family friends, people you know from church/clubs/etc) and you are still having trouble, try contacting your local Panhellenic. They might be able to put you in contact with women who could help with writing recommendations.

Make sure you get a recommendation for EVERY sorority on your campus, even the "less popular" ones. Membership selection information is private, so we can't tell you how much having/not having one will hurt/help you, but having recommendations gives you a "foot in the door" before recruitment that most of the other girls going through recruitment will have. Don't put yourself at a disadvantage by not having recommendations when most other girls do.

Don't post what sororities you already have recs for or what sororities you need recs for online. Just don't.

Please keep an open mind while going through recruitment. Don't listen to what people say are the "most popular" and the "least popular" sororities. Every sorority has something wonderful to offer if you're willing to open your mind and give every group a chance. Also, just because a sorority is "less popular" in the minds of some people doesn't mean that they are any easier to get into. They have standards for their members just like every other sorority does.

I'll also say this because I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt and assuming you aren't trying to offend anyone, you simply just don't know: do not talk to sorority women, whether they are currently in sororities or they are alumna, about what sororities are "more popular" and "less popular". You are almost sure to offend someone, and people talk. If you ask a sorority woman, "Hey, can you write me a recommendation for XYZ? I heard that they are the most popular sorority on campus!" or if you tell a woman that you don't need a recommendation from her because "her sorority is less popular", you're going to come off as offensive. Not only will she probably refuse to write a recommendation for you, she might tell other alumna she knows that you had a poor attitude and that they shouldn't write recommendations for you either.

Be polite, be kind, and be careful with what you say. Above all else, keep an open mind and stop this "more/less popular" talk.

KDCat 02-19-2014 08:14 PM

There's a sticky at the top of this subforum about recs. It would be helpful to you if you read it. It includes information about how to get recs, especially towards the end.

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...112718&page=20

pinksequins 02-19-2014 10:49 PM

Hmmmm. The OP sounds exactly like DevonM -- the questions and phraseology are almost identical ..... Honey, quit posting the same queries and get busy.

DubaiSis 02-19-2014 11:01 PM

To be perfectly clear, no, you don't need recs for ANY sorority at Auburn. But if you want to improve your chances of getting a return invitation, you will find a way. The expectation is that every girl going through rush will have at least one and hopefully 2 solid recs from personal contacts. Without even one that isn't even fairly generic, my guess is you'd be looked at as not really interested enough to play the game.

Think of it this way. I'll make up a system for you. Great grades, 2 points. Good enough grades, 1 point. 2 points for leadership position in an extracurricular, 1 point for being in one. 2 points for beautiful, 1 point for pretty. 2 points for good personal rec, 1 point for generic rec. Etc. So when push comes to shove you need 20 points, and the girls with 19 points don't make the list. You have 19 points for all of your awesomeness. But you didn't want to do the work to get that last rec. How important is it to you to have as big a list of invitations as possible?

Also, to be clear, there are some chapters at Auburn that are more sought after than others, but every chapter makes quota so don't assume any are easy to get into.

33girl 02-19-2014 11:03 PM

I think you're confused about how formal rush works. You don't get to just pick where you want to go. In the first round, you must go to ALL the sororities' parties. After that, it's who asks you back, and you cannot go back unless you are invited.

DubaiSis 02-19-2014 11:19 PM

I'd like to add that "mutual selection" is kind of a misnomer. You can accept your invitations and move forward or you can drop. You don't get to pick and choose, and your preferences come AFTER the preferences of the chapters, so your choice only comes into play if more chapters want you than places on your invitation list. So for instance, if round 2 is 11 parties (I don't recall what it is at Auburn), if all 17 chapters invite you back, then your choices come into play. But if only 11 chapters invite you back, your preference list doesn't mean squat. And most girls do NOT get their exact preference list and do in fact get cut by at least a few (and often more than a few) chapters. The girl who has a full schedule at round 2, even if filled with the bottom of her preference list, is a lucky girl. And a LOT of girls will go into round 2 with 2 or 3 chapters left. The girl who ends rush happiest is the one who graciously accepts her set of invitations, regardless of how impressive, at each round and is open to every chapter. They're all good, and if you can believe that, rush will likely go well for you.

ASTalumna06 02-19-2014 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2261957)
I think you're confused about how formal rush works. You don't get to just pick where you want to go. In the first round, you must go to ALL the sororities' parties. After that, it's who asks you back, and you cannot go back unless you are invited.

If this is what the OP is referring to when she mentions "listing the popular ones vs. the not-so-popular ones" then yes. This x 1000.

Madeline, you don't get to pick and choose which sororities you will return to each day. I know we use the term "mutual selection", but the sororities are doing most of the selecting. You can list your preferences, but depending on where you "rank" (for lack of a better word) on the chapters' invite lists will ultimately determine where you're invited each round. Your selections really only come into play if you receive back more invites from chapters than you're allowed to attend (e.g. for round 2, every girl can only attend 10 parties. You might have "received" invites to 12, but you can only attend 10 as well).

Keep in mind that you don't even know the sorority members yet. Even if we told you to pick all the "popular" chapters, you might just change your mind when you get into the process.

Listen to yourself and ignore the tent talk. Get as many recs as you can for as many of the sororities as possible. Ask everyone you know (including men, who might have wives, girlfriends, sisters, and/or mothers who are NPC members). Because you are a transfer student - and, I'm assuming, will be at least a sophomore by next semester - you should definitely keep an open mind and not rule out any chapter, especially before you even step foot on campus.

Good luck.

ASTalumna06 02-19-2014 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DubaiSis (Post 2261961)
I'd like to add that "mutual selection" is kind of a misnomer. You can accept your invitations and move forward or you can drop. You don't get to pick and choose, and your preferences come AFTER the preferences of the chapters, so your choice only comes into play if more chapters want you than places on your invitation list. So for instance, if round 2 is 11 parties (I don't recall what it is at Auburn), if all 17 chapters invite you back, then your choices come into play. But if only 11 chapters invite you back, your preference list doesn't mean squat. And most girls do NOT get their exact preference list and do in fact get cut by at least a few (and often more than a few) chapters. The girl who has a full schedule at round 2, even if filled with the bottom of her preference list, is a lucky girl. And a LOT of girls will go into round 2 with 2 or 3 chapters left. The girl who ends rush happiest is the one who graciously accepts her set of invitations, regardless of how impressive, at each round and is open to every chapter. They're all good, and if you can believe that, rush will likely go well for you.

Ah, you just beat me to it :)

DubaiSis 02-19-2014 11:58 PM

...because brilliant minds think alike :)


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