Spontaneous or planned Mixers?
 

I need your help regarding this issue.

One of the fraternities my sisters and I would like to mix with wants to do something spontaneously, not have anything planned in advance. For instance, the social chair of the fraternity called one day and said, "My brothers and I are going to dinner at......tell all of your sisters to meet us there in 30 minutes." Okay, this does not work for me or my sisters! First of all, it will take over 30 minutes to get ahold of all of my sisters. Even if I could get ahold of the girls in time, it does take us time to get ready! Hello!!! Also, some girls work and can't get up and leave work to mix!

How do I go about trying to plan something with these guys? If we do not plan something with them, most likely we are not going to mix with these guys. But like I said, their fraternity is one that my sisters would like to mix with. How should I go about trying to plan something with them if they want to mix spontaneously? Also, how are mixers held at your school? Are they planned or spontaneous? Any and all help would be appreciated!

My only response to this fraternity would be "who the hell do you think you are??!?" :mad:

Telling your sisters to be ready for a mixer in half an hour...the nerve. I would tell them to take a flying @#*% through a rolling doughnut. We NEVER had an unplanned mixer like this, and would have probably not even communicated any further with a fraternity that made such a rude request.

Now on the other hand, we hung out with Crows all the time, and there would be times when they'd call the house and say "we have a keg if any of you guys want to come down." That was completely different - it was not a mixer or official event.

Tell them you DO NOT operate this way and if they want to mix with you, it must be scheduled. If they won't do something as simple as that, I don't think you're missing anything by not associating with them. They sound like arrogant jerks to me.

33girl, is right. Viscious, but right. If you can't schedule something in advance with their group . . . well that is just strange.

If they want a spontaneous mixer, then make sure your sority is initiating it. Call the fraternity last minute and see how many show up.

Oh and if all the brothers are going out to dinner at one time, that is not spontaneous, thats a planned event they didn't share with you.

What we did this semester is have Exec. Board sit down and plan out our entire schedule with advisors and alums, plotting out the new member program first and then choosing tentative dates for social events (i.e., ok, Tuesday the 13th is open for a dated/mixer, we'll talk to some fraternities; and Friday the 6th is the tentative date for Crush, etc). We typed it all up and distributed calenders to the chapter at the first meeting of the semester so people who work and stuff could kind of plan ahead for possible social events, not just have a week to try and find someone to cover for them, etc.

Anyways, back to your point. We had a spontaneous social event this semester- but it fell on one of the "tentative" dates, so lots of people were aware that something would likely be going on that night. We actually took out an ad in the school paper:

ALPHA CHI'S
FIND A DATE AND MEET AT _________
AT 8 PM

something like that. It was tons of fun and everyone had a blast. My suggestion is get a tentative date from this fraternity and let you sisters know that it's quite likely there will be a mystery social event that evening. That way they have a heads up, and hopefully it will work out :)

good luck
Maya:D

Thank you all so much! :D

Just wanted to give you all a little update!

Turns out the fraternity we are wanting to mix with got a new social chair who is SUPER organized, not into the whole spontaneous thing. Him and I are going to talk this week and set something up that fits both of our schedules!!!

Thank you all for your help!!

Good!

With the busy schedules of all the members-- why the crap would anyone put up with the spontaneous social BS?

Glad that fraternity got a new social chair...sounded like they needed one!