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In-House Legacies
I know the NPC groups supposedly have the same policy on legacies: that legacies must be invited back to at least one round of parties and that legacies who make it to prefs must be placed on the first bid list.
How does your chapter deal with in-house legacies (PNMs whose sisters actually live in the house) whom you really don't want to pledge? |
Just to clarify, I think Carnation means their sisters are active members, not necessarily living in the chapter house.
We have never had this problem. Usually we have met the in-house legacies prior to formal rush and really want them. |
Same here... Last year, we had several in-house legacies coming through and all of them were extended bids unless they told someone directly that they didn't want one. (There are always a couple of girls who don't go to their blood sister's house simply because they don't want to be in the same sorority as their sister for individuality reasons.)
For the most part, all of the in-house legacies have been to the house several times in the past so that sisters already know them and like them. They are usually all given bids with no problem. :) |
The in-house legacies that have come through since I've been in my chapter have all been really cool, so it was never a problem. I guess we have been lucky. They are girls who probably would have gotten bids even if they hadn't been legacies.
It's certainly true, some girls just don't want to be in their blood sister's sorority, for whatever reason. |
We had several sets of biological sisters in my house. It was never a problem, when the younger sister came thru, in most cases we already knew her and wanted her.
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Luckily, in my three years at ZTA, we have never come across that problem. We have liked all the younger sisters of our actives. I guess if that were to happen we'd probably keep our mouths shut and bid her out of respect for the active unless the PNM is really, really, really horrible (like she has 1.1 gpa and has an addiction to illegal substances).
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Carnation-Do you mean at the same school? We had a girl come through at Oklahoma State whose sister was an active at UT. We bid her, but we wouln't have felt nearly as bad about releasing her as an active member of our own chapter.
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I would extend her sister a bid without raising any pros or cons out of respect for your sorority sister and her loyalty to her sister. If you feel you must raise pros and cons, her sister should leave the room. Be careful about what you do because you don't want to offend your sister.
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Hi, I'm a new member to GreekChat, but I saw this post and had to jump right in. We had this exact same problem this past year during rush. We had a girl rushing, who was biological sisters with a rather "inactive" sister. Our sorority sister did not even show up to rush the day of second round cuts. We were very unsure with what to do, but we came to the conclusion that if it were our biological sister, we would want her to be extended a bid, no questions asked. Our chapter now has 2 biological sisters to call our own. The "inactive" sister does a lot more now, and our new sister is a wonderful addition to our chapter. Having her sister pledge was what got her re-involved in the sorority, and we're glad we made the right decision.
~Randi |
We only had one situation where we were unsure about a biological sis, but she had no desire to pledge us, either, so it all worked out. Their family situation was screwy to say the very least so I can understand why they would want to be in different sororities.
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I have seen the good and bad sides of PNMs and currently active sisters. It's wonderful if the chapter loves the PNM for herself and not just because she is Sister A's biological sister.
I don't know the rules or if would be handled the same way now, but we did have a case where a PNM wasn't desired. The active sister was in the room while the voting was going on and was devastated to hear why her initiated sisters didn't want her biological sister. Needless to say, the active sister turned in her badge that night..or at least, started the process. She had been an asset to the chapter up until that night. I can understand wanting to pledge someone because their brother/sister is already initiated, but as with any PNM, the chapter has to decide how that PNM will affect the chapter, positively or negatively, and make the best decision they can during such a short timespan. |
I think that the most important thing is to treat an in house leg the same as any other potential member. Sometimes the girls in the house feel like she is sure to want the sorority so they sort of consider it a done deal and they don't give her the attention she deserves. Or, they pay TOO much attention and drool all over her 'cause they are so excited that she is there...OR, they constantly refer to her as "so and so's sister" or they ask too many questions about her sister. Anyway, you get the point :)
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The issue never came up when I was an active - but with AEPhi, IIRC, if an in-house legacy comes through rush, the active sister is excused from the discussion and voting process for her bio sister. (She does get a vote, which she hands to the rush chair before leaving the room.) I believe that first cousins can also ask to be excused if they wish.
The idea is that the rest of the chapter can be honest in their discussion without worrying about hurting their sister, and so that the member whose bio sister is coming through doesn't have to listen to her sorority sisters saying potentially negative things about her bio sister... so that a situation like Rosealum described doesn't happen. As with any legacy, an in-house legacy is automatically invited back to the second round of parties, and if she makes it to pref she goes on the first bid list. |
I'm so glad we haven't had to deal with this situation! We have probably eight or nine sets of in-house sisters (and a few cousins) in our chapter, and all of the girls are awesome - they'd have gotten a ZTA bid regardless!!
I'd have to say that we'd give a bid to a biological sister of any ZTA in our chapter - any other way and it'd be heart-breaking for the ZTA in the family. Besides, if the younger sister didn't fit in, she'd know it and probably choose not to join. |
I know of two incidents where a sister was cut at LSU. One happened years ago and another this year-this year's girl did end up in another house. Remember the stories on this year's LSU rush..brutal.
A third example this year is a sister NOT wanting to pledge her blood (in house) sister's soro. She did go to their pref and was matched. It's all good though, she's happy!!! |
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