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-   -   Mother of Princeton men tells women they'd better get to marrying (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=133354)

SWTXBelle 04-01-2013 08:54 AM

Mother of Princeton men tells women they'd better get to marrying
 
https://socialreader.com/me/channels...dingExternal-1


" Why else would Susan Patton, the mother of two Princeton-attending sons, direly warn young women in a letter to the editor of the Daily Princetonian that if they don't snatch up the bright young men in college---men like her son---then they will run a very high risk of being forever alone with their cats and their books?"

AlphaFrog 04-01-2013 09:11 AM

Oh, cheese and rice, that is HILARIOUS.

Potential future MIL material for sure, said no woman ever.

AOII Angel 04-01-2013 09:28 AM

She actually defended herself on Huffpost saying she was divorced and wished she'd married a Princeton man. :rolleyes: Thanks for the insight into your personal baggage, lady.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/susan-...women&ir=Women

sigmadiva 04-01-2013 09:52 AM

From the original letter:

"...you will never again be surrounded by this concentration of men who are worthy of you."

As mentioned in the comments section below the article SWTXBelle posted, I also agree with this comment.

I have found this to be very true.

adpiucf 04-01-2013 10:05 AM

I agree with where she is coming from. It's much harder to meet people once you are out of school. On the other hand, there are variables that you don't really know yourself at 18-22.

I guess I missed my opportunity! ;)

BraveMaroon 04-01-2013 10:13 AM

Yeah, that ought to help her Special Snowflake sons' dating lives.

AOII Angel 04-01-2013 10:15 AM

Women in college aren't always there, nor should they be, looking for a Mrs. If they don't find a husband in college or ever but have a fulfilling career, are they somehow less womanly or complete than their peers that did? I think taking advice from a woman who unhappily married and has delusions of grandeur about all the Princeton men that could have been is the last thing college women need to think about. FWIW, just because you have a large pool of single men around you in college doesn't mean you are surrounded by a large pool of men looking for marriage...as evidenced by the number of accomplished, single women who escape higher education without rings on their hands every year.

AlphaFrog 04-01-2013 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sigmadiva (Post 2210903)
From the original letter:

"...you will never again be surrounded by this concentration of men who are worthy of you."

As mentioned in the comments section below the article SWTXBelle posted, I also agree with this comment.

I have found this to be very true.


I think it depends on your values. Someone else may say that their church is where they will find someone "worthy". For every man with an Ivy Diploma, there's probably a proportional amount of assholes to those without greenery on their matricular documentation.

ElvisLover 04-01-2013 01:45 PM

Amen to this, Low C.

Old_Row 04-01-2013 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Low C Sharp (Post 2210914)
So do I.

I doubt I'm on the same page as the writer, and I strongly agree that many young women don't want what she assumes they want. But I do think that those women to whom relationships are important should be making time for them in college. It's a mistake to wait until later in life to think about this goal if it is your goal. The best men really do get snapped up quick. You don't have to get married in college or right after, but at least get some practice relationships in, and if you meet a real gem, hang on to him.

I agree! I hate how some people act like there's something wrong with you if you want to meet your future husband at college. I can't think of many better places to find educated men with a better possibility of being successful in life. You can be a feminist and want to get married and have your babies young. I think it is all about being free to make the choices that are right for you!

DubaiSis 04-01-2013 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Low C Sharp (Post 2210914)
The best men really do get snapped up quick.

I would patently disagree with this statement. I didn't do a lot of dating in college because I just wasn't into the whole thing. But I found men improved DRAMATICALLY after 30. I think some women might be ready to settle down in their early 20's but guys IMO are not mature enough to deal with all of it that young. I might suggest maintaining a hands-off relationship with the guys you think might have potential once they figure it out, but latching onto him 5 years before he's ready will result in frustration and/or unnecessary divorce. When I was starting to meet the quality guys in my early 30's they ALL seemed to be divorced, and to a man they had all gotten married just before they turned 25 and on reflection they would admit they got married at that time because that's what you're supposed to do. They maintained social convention instead of holding out a few more years to actually be ready to settle down.

And FYI there is no correlation between a fancy diploma and a quality personality. Douchiness has no social ceiling.

DeltaBetaBaby 04-01-2013 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Old_Row (Post 2210973)
I agree! I hate how some people act like there's something wrong with you if you want to meet your future husband at college. I can't think of many better places to find educated men with a better possibility of being successful in life. You can be a feminist and want to get married and have your babies young. I think it is all about being free to make the choices that are right for you!

There is a big difference between "I am going to school to earn a degree and start my career and if I meet someone, that's a nice bonus" and "I am going to school to meet someone instead of having a career". The latter is problematic, for a whole bunch of reasons, the least of which is the consumption of educational resources for someone who never plans to use them.

Old_Row 04-01-2013 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 2210985)
There is a big difference between "I am going to school to earn a degree and start my career and if I meet someone, that's a nice bonus" and "I am going to school to meet someone instead of having a career". The latter is problematic, for a whole bunch of reasons, the least of which is the consumption of educational resources for someone who never plans to use them.

I think it's very sad and unenlightened that you think the only people who deserve a college education are the ones planning on working outside the home.

ADPiEE 04-01-2013 03:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DubaiSis (Post 2210974)
Douchiness has no social ceiling.

:Dl^

As someone who met my amazing husband the very day I moved home from college after graduating, I have to disagree with the article.

I did go to college wanting to find a career AND a spouse because I knew those were things I wanted in life. I agree that there will probably never be an easier time to meet men than during college. I remember many of my friends (Greek and non-Greek) making wedding plans our senior year and I felt a little panicky. I went on to graduate school and still didn't meet Mr. right...so I moved back home to start my career. I had kind of given up on marriage so of course that's when I met Mr. Right. I wish I could go back and tell my college self to quit worrying about it. Had I met my future husband while I was in college, it never would have worked out so there's a good reason we met when we did.

So, what will I tell my daughter? Enjoy college, have faith, God has a plan and timing is everything.

ADPiEE 04-01-2013 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Old_Row (Post 2210990)
I think it's very sad and unenlightened that you think the only people who deserve a college education are the ones planning on working outside the home.

There are large amounts of research that demonstrate that the level of education that a MOTHER attains has the most direct influence on the level of education that her children attain (as opposed to the father).

So, if you plan on having children, regardless of whether you plan to work outside the home or inside the home, my recommendation as someone with advanced degrees in Education would be to go to college :)


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