HELP! Informal and Different Bid Days!
 

Hey, everyone. I need some help with informal rush etiquette and policies.

There are two sororities I'm rushing... Let's just call them ABC and XYZ

ABC is my first choice, and their interest sessions start in a few days.
XYZ is a second choice (kind of) and their interest sessions already started.

XYZ has their preference ceremony 10 days before ABC has their preference ceremony and has their bid day 6 days before ABC's pref ceremony. ABC didn't say when their bid day was.

What if I get a bid even before the pref ceremony from my top choice? I would still like to show interest in XYZ if I don't get a bid from ABC, but if I get a bid from both, I would rather join ABC.

Help!

You don't know that you'd rather accept a bid from ABC - you haven't gone through rush yet. Keep an open mind and proceed through the process.

I wish for you that they offered their bids at about the same time period, but it is what it is. If XYZ won't wait for you to finish the process with ABC, then you are just going to have to make a decision and be prepared to live with the consequences. This kind of decision is really common in grown up life - do you accept the job that's been offered to you or hold out for the one you really want but don't know if you'll be offered? You might as well learn now that there are difficult choices to be made in life.

Good luck!

Are these NPC sororities, NPHC sororities, local sororities, or something else?

If this is NPC, and this is informal rush, there may be a "bid day" but it doesn't mean they can't give out bids after that. It happens during formal rush all the time for groups that don't fill to quota or total.

Go ahead and go through all the sessions for ABC. If XYZ really wants you, they will not pressure you to make a decision before you're ready. (This scheduling kind of smacks of XYZ trying to prey on unsure rushees, actually.)

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought bids are good for a certain amount of time after they are given out? Could the OP get a bid from XYZ and wait to see what happens with ABC before accepting/denying it?

It's usually 24 or 48 hours. Which is not enough time in the OP's scenario.

Although, the phrasing "interest sessions" makes me think this may not be NPC...in which case we should probably all stay in our lane. :)

The sororities are NPC.

From what I heard and read, if you decline a bid from someone you are not eligible for another bid until next year, and I'll be a junior, so possibly too old. Is that true, even with informal rush?
And I don't want to be rude, so if I do get one I don't want to be, "Hey, thanks. I'll let you know when I hear back from my top choice in a few days; if I don't get it, I'll join with you guys."

Any more advice based on that? Do some sororities have strict 24/48 hour policies, or are some more lax with things like that?
And of course, I don't want to stop showing interest or decline straight up and not get a bid from ABC.

Thank you so much for your help.

I am thrown by "interest sessions" in the same post as "preference party".

Didn't we just have a discussion about this in another thread? Is it true that you don't have to wait a year with informal recruitment?

If so, couldn't she accept the bid from XYZ, then "drop" and accept ABC's bid (if she was offered one)?

Or do we not know this for sure?

Is it called rushing? I don't know much about the whole process so I'm not sure on correct terminology.
:confused:
I guess I associated rushing with all of the sororities and interest sessions as events individual sororities have as a get to know you kind of thing.

We're talking about two different things here. If you go through formal recruitment and SIGN a bid card and are offered a bid, THEN decline the bid, you cannot go through recruitment for a calendar year.

In this situation, you will not be signing a bid card before deciding whether or not to accept or decline a bid from XYZ. If you decline an offered bid, you are still free to try for ABC AND go through formal recruitment if you don't receive a bid from ABC. XYZ may choose to release you since you turned down a bid...who knows. That's up to them, but there is no rule stopping you from going through. BUT if you accept XYZs bid AND sign a bid card, you are then bound to them.

It is only if you SIGN A BID CARD and then quit pledging that you are ineligible for a year. You can decline 20 bids in 20 days and take #21 with no problem.

xorosho - what you may be thinking is that in formal rush, after you sign your pref card, you are bound to the sororities you wrote on that card. In other words, signing a bid card = signing a bid.

If you don't sign anything you're fine. If XYZ pressures you, just let them know that you are keeping an open mind and looking at more than one sorority and you would like time to finish that process before you sign a bid with anyone. If they can't understand that, it is not a place you want to be.

ASTalumna06 - maybe she could technically with that rule we discussed, but I can't imagine how that would be a positive way to conduct oneself. Like I said, if XYZ wants her badly enough, they will wait and offer her another bid if the first one expires, rather than playing on her (and other rushees') worry that they won't get bids from groups that are not making decisions until later.

I'm going to ask around and see what the process at my school is. I just don't want to mess myself up. Thanks.

JInx, buy me a coke :)

OP, have you tried asking the greek life office? I realize this is informal, but you can't possibly be the only PNM in this situation.

LOL...I'm faster than you!