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-   -   Nervous... (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=123028)

gogreek2012 11-11-2011 10:53 PM

Nervous...
 
So this year I went through formal recruitment and recieved a bid from a house I wasnt in love and so I declined the bid. Unfortunately, they took it personal and started saying really nasty things about me to another sorority on campus. I plan to RUSH again my sophmore year and I am really nervous that this will hurt my chances. All I ever wanted to do was go greek! What do I do? Im worried I will get cut first day from everyone. Im a really nice girl and I have a lot of good qualities and I want the other soros to see that and not listen to what they hear from an offended chapter. Advice?

33girl 11-11-2011 11:00 PM

If the chapter isn't well regarded on campus - and they probably aren't if they're saying crap like that and looking like sore losers - it shouldn't be a problem.

IrishLake 11-11-2011 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gogreek2012 (Post 2106030)
So this year I went through formal recruitment and recieved a bid from a house I wasnt in love and so I declined the bid. Unfortunately, they took it personal and started saying really nasty things about me to another sorority on campus. I plan to RUSH again my sophmore year and I am really nervous that this will hurt my chances. All I ever wanted to do was go greek! What do I do? Im worried I will get cut first day from everyone. Im a really nice girl and I have a lot of good qualities and I want the other soros to see that and not listen to what they hear from an offended chapter. Advice?

Are you sure all you ever wanted to do was "go greek?" Or did you really only want to go to one particular group? It seems to me if it was the former, then you would have accepted your bid and given it a shot. And based on your other post of really wanting to impress the ADPi's on your campus, you seem not to care about any of the other groups.

The only thing you can do is give it another shot and hope for the best. Depending on how competitive things are at your college, you might be able to get a different outcome. Be involved on your campus, and don't stalk or set your sights on one particular sorority.

victoriana 11-11-2011 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IrishLake (Post 2106037)
The only thing you can do is give it another shot and hope for the best. Depending on how competitive things are at your college, you might be able to get a different outcome. Be involved on your campus, and don't stalk or set your sights on one particular sorority.

Girls do this sometimes, and it seems desperate and creepy. I would definitely keep an open mind and do your best to improve your resume, conversation skills, rec letters, appearance, or whatever you feel you need to work on so you'll have a good shot at getting a bid. It will probably be harder for you as a sophomore, but if you really put in the effort hopefully things will work out! Be prepared for the worst, but hope and try for the best.

gogreek2012 11-11-2011 11:34 PM

I really just want to be greek, no particular orginazation, but my aunt was an ADPi and she loved it. I really want the lasting bonds of sisterhood and girls that could be my future bridesmaids but the orginal chapter I got into had girls that were more in it for the title and to meet boys. I wanted more than that and I hope I can find it next year during rush
~Bridey

IrishLake 11-11-2011 11:57 PM

If you'll spend some time doing some reading here, you'll find lots of great advice regarding re-rushing. At the same time, stop saying that you just want to be greek, because you had the opportunity and you rejected it. A group loved you enough to give you a bid. You rejected it because they had image issues. Fair enough, but stop saying that all you want is to be greek. You're contradicting yourself. Then keep in mind the next time you go through rush that one particular stereotype does not define all of the members of one group. If you're fortunate enough to receive another bid, and this especially applies if it is not your number one choice, I encourage you to see things out and give it a try. There are tons of success stories here on GC of ladies who received bids to their second or even third choices, and ended up falling in love with their chapter.

aephi alum 11-12-2011 02:01 AM

^ What IrishLake said.

If a chapter is badmouthing you because they offered you a bid and you declined it, that reflects badly on them. At my school, everyone (actives participating in rush and alums helping out) had to pass a simple written test before they'd be allowed on the floor. The first question was always, "What is the most important rule of rush?" The answer was "To show goodwill towards all other chapters and their members" (or words to that effect - "goodwill" was the keyword).

I haven't read your other posts outside this thread. If "all [you] ever wanted to do was go greek" - you had the chance and you turned it down. If you went into rush with preconceived ideas of which chapter(s) you would join or not join, that contradicts your statement that you "just want to go greek" - it's more than letters on a t-shirt, for crying out loud. If you went in with your heart set on one chapter, and they cut you - that's life - rejection happens, it hurts, get used to it, and if being cut from your favorite chapter is your first experience with rejection, you're damn lucky.

Do rush next year if you choose, but keep an open mind as you do so. You will be going in with the cards stacked against you.


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