can you wear black?
 

My daughter and I are at odds over some of her choices for rush outfits, especially her perf night choice. She has selected a black/charcoal gray dress. Her older sister (a Phi Mu) told her that most houses wear black dresses for perf and she'd get "lost in the crowd" and wearing a color would help her stand out. Any thoughts/help on this? thanks.

I've heard this before, don't know how true it is though. From my side of recruitment, in my chapter, we really did not care if a girl wore black (even though we all did during pref), but other chapters/campuses may consider girls in black "lost in the crowd". If her sister is on the same campus as her, I would heed her advice.

I would say heed the advice of those on campus and maybe look to see if her school has a website/facebook fan page with a 'what to wear' section. That could give you a hint. The positives of black are that it is a neutral, it is easy to find, and it is not any sorority's "color", so it can't be misconstrued that your daughter wants that chapter based on the color dress she is wearing.

Though my .02 (completely anecdotal, of course) is that for my campus and chapter, I have no idea what color dresses the women I preffed were. First of all, I was super jittery with nerves because it was my first time recruiting people, second, I was trying to remember as much as I could about each girl so as to not repeat topics and have a more in depth conversation, and third, it is dim in our room for pref night for the ceremony, so it would have been a hard call anyway. So basically, the dress, at that point (and for me, as I can only speak for myself) did not matter. I'd imagine all the women I preffed were indeed wearing one, but I personally had a lot else on my mind that night. :D

Wearing a color can help you stand out, BUT if she's going to be hideously uncomfortable in color she'll stand out in the wrong way.

See if she can find something in maybe a deep plum or navy (i.e. does a lot of the nice things black does for you without actually being black). She might need to get out of the junior department for that.

the limited has some gorgeous dresses right now and I know today there was a sale. no affiliation with limited, but for me I've had a lot of success finding clothes appropriate for recruitment there.

Thanks, this has been very helpful. My daughter is not on the same campus as her sister and no legacy there:(. If I can't steer her from the black dress maybe some bright accessories??? Also.... should the fabrics be more "toned down?" she has a lot of satin (homecoming dresses) are those appropriate? Most are not sexy or over done.

Bright accessories or distinctive jewelry would definitely be a plus. As for the satin, there are all kinds of satin - from kinda flashy to very understated. I would find a poster who goes/went to the school to ask that one.

I like the bright accessories idea. Beautiful way to stand out (i love wearing fun things in my hair!)

It's ok to wear black, but wearing a different color might help her stand out more.

When I was a rho chi (back when we were called rho chis) we were asked to dress up on pref night, but we were expressly forbidden to wear solid black or solid white (one chapter wore white, the others wore black). I wore a black top and a black-and-white print skirt. Something like that might work ...

The charcoal grey dress might work if she added some color with a scarf or something.

I would stay away from satin - even if it's a more "toned down" version, it's just so easy to look over-done. Plus, it's a pretty hot fabric (I've never worn a satin dress that I didn't feel like I was going to die in) and houses/meeting rooms during pref can get really hot.

If she wants to wear the charcoal/black (I love charcoal in place of black), she should go the distinctive jewelry route, if she can. Nothing too over-the-top but bright colors would be great. Of course, a poster/member from the school she's going to can give better advice, or check the college Greek website to see if there are guidelines.

It depends on the campus. At some schools, the few pnms who don't wear black stick out and can feel awkward because of it.

Kappa Alpha Theta?

My sister wore a cheetah print dress for her pref. She definitely stood out, I'm sure! :p For pref this year, active sisters in her chapter are to wear navy blue dresses with nude color heels.

Remember the black and gold, dear...

:D and a flick of the kite tail in your direction, too, appreciatively!

Get the fuck out of my office, that's exactly what I'm wearing right now.