When is a good time . . .
 

To stop using condoms? Is there ever a good time? Do you use them for protection against disease, pregnancy, or both? If you stopped using condoms with your mate, did you get an HIV test first?

[DISCLAIMER: This is NOT, I repeat, NOT, an attempt to get all up in people's biz. I'd like this to be a safe sex kind of discussion. If you feel uncomfortable posting your views/feelings, register under a bogus name. It's just that I can see how this might get personal/touchy. But it needs to be talked about.:)]

Good topic...
 

I think that trust has to be established 1st and each person should know what they want from the relationship, b4 anything comes off.

For me, the best time to stop using condoms is AFTER we both have been tested and, of course, the results are negative. This is what I've done in the past and will continue to do.

For me, the time that I'll stop using condoms is when I get married. I have never had unprotected sex. That will be my gift to my husband. I can't give him my virginity but I will give myself to him in a way that no one else in this world can say that they have.

For others, whenever they're ready. Preferably, when they are in a committed, monogamous relationship. This means that both people are only having sex with the other. Not, "well, it's okay because I use condoms with everyone else" or "he's not cheating so it doesn't matter". If you're not being faithful, how can you expect someone to be faithful to you.

I especially hate when females say "I make him use condoms with all those other girls." :mad: If he's not using them with you, what makes you think that he's not running that same game on the other girls.

I hate people who are irresponsible when it comes to safe sex. That's why there continue to be new AIDS cases and unwanted pregnancies. With all of the information out there on AIDS, people should know better. There shouldn't be any more new infections. Okay, I'm ranting now so I'll stop. I'm an AIDS activist, can you tell?

Shhhhhhoooooottttttttt, there are married folks who are using condoms. And from what their spouses are doing, they need to continue using them.

Soror you took my words!!
 

Aint that the dam* truth. What about all these men running around having a double life with the same sex and bringing all kinds of chit home. I know all the local radio stations have been talking about this topic alot lately. I guess even if you are married you need to do the backdoor finger test.:eek:

Re: Soror you took my words!!
 

All I can say is.....Have you ladies read B-Boy Blues? That's some spooky chit!:o

Well, this is a very sensitive topic. You just really have to use your judgement. If you are in a relationship and feel you can trust this person, and you've both had STD tests, then it should be okay. But on the flip side of that, if that person cheats on you and doesn't use a condom, they could give you something that they didn't even know they had. So I guess it's a judgement call.

#1 Braveheart
PI, Spring 2001