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After my unhappy ending...
...I've been doing a lot of thinking.
For those of you who followed my story, this is an update. For those who didn't read my story, here's the Readers Digest version: I didn't get a bid and was released on Pref Night. Here's the update I promised: I am investigating a service sorority on my campus (well, more than investigating, but that's a whole different story) as well as toying with the idea of going through a second time next fall (as well as checking or informal in the winter/spring). Here's the question(s) that nearly always accompanies a post of mine: 1. Is it worth it? Going through Formal again. I know it differs by school but.. 2. What can I change, or do differently/better next year? 3. I will be a sophomore next year so I know that'll be against me, but is there anything I can do to make myself stand out other than getting as good of a GPA as I can and joining some clubs (already on that!) Any advice on girls who've gone through twice and had positive results would be fantastic! |
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2. To answer this question, you really do have to take a good look at yourself and examine why it is you think you didn't receive a bid. Example: did you have bad grades, were you not as outgoing as other PNMs, did you not present yourself well etc? Sometimes that takes some time to figure out and work on. 3. Again, that's something else to figure out on your own. For example: some people realize that all the other PNMs knew sorority members outside of recruitment, had recs, etc. and they didn't. So they set out to give themselves that advantage next year. A good piece of advice is if you are a 2nd time PNM at a more competitive school, be sure to be open-minded. I find it funny when someone goes through a second time with only certain chapters that they will join. It almost never ends well. |
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2/3. I see you're point that these are things I need to look at for myself, but are there things that look good on resumes? And meeting current girls in sororities, if only I had some in my classes. >.< The only classes I have them in are the 1000+ lecture halls that have assigned seating that I don't sit next to any of them. Maybe next semester. :D Oh, and I agree at being open minded. I was very open minded the first time and fell in love with a chapter I'd never looked at before. I do know that when I go through a second time (if I do), I'll have to be even more open minded as a pledge class can dramatically change a chapter so everything I thought this year will be null and void. |
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I tend to think that it is worth it. You really never know if you'll get a bid if you don't try. The worst that can happen is that you don't get one.
About your question: Sure there are things that look good on resumes (every chapter tends to have some activities that they think "oh wow" when they see that a PNM is involved in them). However, a PNM's resume and how she presents herself on paper is only part of recruitment. Actvities alone aren't going to get you a bid. Example: Miss Pageant Queen could have a stellar resume but come off as Regina George 2.0 in person... |
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I like what you said though, "who share that passion", now I just need to find a few clubs on campus that are into writing and saving animals. Ha ha. |
Is it worth it? That's up to you to decide. But you don't have to decide today whether to rush next year.
What can you change? Aside from the obvious - keeping your grades up and getting yourself out there - nothing. You are who you are. Standing out? You will be a sophomore, and having only 3 years rather than 4 to contribute as an active member will not help. BUT you have an entire year to get to know your fellow freshmen who are affiliated, and to build up your good name on campus. Joining a service sorority, or doing community service on your own, is a good. Basically, keep your grades up, be visible in a good way, keep an eye out for COB if you're interested in going that route... and see where the road takes you. Good luck. |
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So I take it the advice is basically telling me to find something I'm really interested in on campus, look in myself and see what I can make better for next year, and meet some girls/guys in the Greek system and make friends? Oh, and get more recs. Yes? |
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Clubs are good, student government if there's something that interests you, religious groups, and so on. On my campus there are lots of Greeks volunteering at the Humane Society, so you'd definitely meet them off campus. If your department holds events, go to those, and anything else that catches your fancy. Even if you meet no Greeks you'll meet people who may help you in other ways later, such as jobs, internships, and it can also go on your resume. Finding one bigger thing to be involved in is great, and other small things are fun too. We have a volunteer and civic engagement center, intra-murals, study groups for large common classes, and I'm sure your school has a version of these. |
Yes. It's possible that you were cut for a reason, but more than likely you just weren't high enough on the various lists when they got pushed through the computer. Having friends, experience, outstanding grades, sparkling conversation skills, etc. are details that move you higher on the lists. Do what you love, be happy, make friends, and you can have a successful second shot. Even the most competitive schools take sophomores - just maybe not that many. And once you HAVE made friends with some Greek women, let them know you are really interested in membership. There may be some COBing happening that you wouldn't otherwise know about. But this is not the conversation to have 2 minutes after meeting her. Only with REAL friends...
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I don't know what school you are at, but recs may be a really big deal, and you only had them for a few chapters.
Also, is there any COB happening right now? I read back through your thread, and you seem pretty open-minded, so if any of the chapters did not make quota, maybe you could discreetly get on your lists. Again, I have no idea what school you are at, so I have no idea if this is really an option for you at the moment. Finally, if your school is competitive, the chapters are only allowed a limited number of invitations, and as much as they want the best girls, they also need to maximize their returns. I won't get too mathy, but the bottom line is that they often choose the girl who is a sure thing over someone who isn't clearly interested in their chapter. So, you should show interest everywhere, and as discussed elsewhere on GC, don't tell them if you are a legacy somewhere else, concerned about finances, etc. |
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